Capcom vs SNK 2: Millionaire Fighting 2001
by Black Phoenix1
Summary: Capcom and SNK collide once again in this funny fan-fic... (Chapter 11 and 12 now uploaded!)
1. THE SIGN-UP

(This is a special message for the viewers at Fanfiction

(This is a special message for the viewers at Fanfiction.net.I will be uploading new chapters every few days.Oh, and I'm looking forward to feedback).

CHAPTER 1: THE SIGN-UP

b The year is 2001.No more than a year ago, Capcom and SNK collided in the first ever Capcom vs SNK tourney.Generously opening their wallets again, Robert Garcia and Ken Masters decide to fund yet another tournament…Capcom vs SNK 2: Millionaire Fighting 2001!Follow along, as I tell you the tale of this faithful tourney…/b

bTwo days before the 2001 tourney, in the main signup area/b

TODO: *signing up*…..

RYO: *walks up*Alright, time to fill this out.

TODO: …Hmm…He is here…

RYO: *checking pockets*Damn…hey, can I borrow that pen after you're done, Todo?

TODO: ASK FOR IT WITH YOUR POWER!!

RYO: …never mind…

ITerry and Rock are seen practicing something in the corner/I

ROCK: Geese!

TERRY: GEEEEEEEESE!

ROCK: GEESE!

TERRY: No, no, no Rock.You've got to sound…more retarded.Like this!GEEEEEESE!

ROCK: GEEESE!

TERRY: You're getting it!Don't forget to shake your fist, also.*shaking fist at real Geese*GEEEEEEEEESE!

GEESE: Will you stop saying my name, please?

TERRY: GEEEEEEEESE!

GEESE: *shakes head*I did his dad a favor by killing him…

TERRY: What was that?

GEESE: Nothing!*Walks off*

IAndy and Joe are seen signing up/I

ANDY: Finally, I'll get to be in THIS tournament.

JOE: Yea, it was kind of a bummer without you last year.

ANDY: It was all cuz of that damn Yamazaki…why, if he were here right now, I'd—

YAMAZAKI: You'd what?

ANDY: *Turns around with big eyes*I'd tell you…that I missed you…man. YAMAZAKI: *fills out form* Sure thing Bogard…*walks away*

ANDY: Whew, that was close.

JOE: *snickering*

ANDY: What?

JOE: Nothing.

ROLENTO: *finishes signing up*HEY!*Snaps finger and his soldiers appear from the ceiling*

SOLDIERS: HEY!HEY!*One soldier stabs Andy*

JOE: Oh not again…

IRyu and Ken walk out of Ken's office/I

RYU: So this is all gonna be one big tax write-off?

KEN: Yup, I'm one smart cookie.I'm gonna have to make sure I win this year though.

RYU: Why's that?

KEN: Cuz I don't want anyone taking that million $$$'s from me!

RYU: Oh…*looks over to where Eliza and Mel are*

MEL: Ha!Hoo!Wa!*Playing Gameboy Advance*

ELIZA: Honey, you stay here while mommy tries to score.

MEL: Okay, mom.

ELIZA: *grabs Joe and Dan by their arms* Shall we?

DAN: YAHOOI!

JOE: YES!Finally, I'll actually HAVE a reason to show my ass!

RYU: *watches Eliza leave with Joe and Dan*Hey um, Ken?

KEN: Yea?

RYU: Have you been…you know, spending "quality time" with Eliza lately?

KEN: Oh hell yea!She's like an animal, man!

RYU: Oh…

KEN: Why?

RYU: No reason.

IKyo and Iori are seen facing off in the hall/I

KYO: What's the matter with you?Can't you just leave me alone for once?

IORI: My flame will devour you!

KYO: No way your flame is better than mine!

IORI: *makes flame bigger* HA! HA! HA!

KYO: *makes flame even bigger* HA!

IORI: Grrr…*makes giant ball of flame*…TOP THAT!

KYO: That's it!FLAME ON!

BENIMARU: Uh oh…

KYO: *Bursts into flame*AHH!I'm on fire!I'm on fire!I'm on fire!*Running around in circles*

IORI: *sobbing* WHY DO YOU ALWAYS TOP ME, KUSANAGI!!!*sulks as he walks away*

KYO: *runs by Benimaru and sets him on fire*

BENIMARU: AH!NOT MY HAIR!*runs around in circles as well*

RYU: *shaking head* Boy…people really like these SNK guys?

KEN: Beats me.

bOnly two days till the beginning of the tourney.Who will be the victor?Will Kusanagi ever stop "flaming on"?And will Ken ever find out that his wife is a nymphomaniac?/b

KEN: What!?!

bNothing./b

KEN: Oh okay.


	2. IT HAS BEGUN!

CHAPTER 2: IT HAS BEGUN

CHAPTER 2:IT HAS BEGUN!

bThe first day has arrived, and the qualifying rounds have already begun.Warriors Ryu, Ken, Terry, and Kyo have already won their respective matches, and will be competing in the real tournament.The next fight is about to begin.

In the men's locker room/b

RYO: Man, I need to use the toilet BADLY!*knocks on toilet door*

TODO: *from inside stall* Hmm…he is here…

RYO: Todo, stop hogging the toilet.I need it now!

TODO: *from inside stall* ASK FOR IT…ugh…WITH…grr…gya…YOUR POWER!!!

RYO: Ewwww…*walks away*

IRyu and Ken are seen relaxing on a bench, conversing/I

KEN: Man, did you see me whip Clark's ass?That guy didn't stand a chance!

RYU: Yea, and that Ralf guy didn't do much better.

KEN: It's a shame that those two couldn't make it into the tournament again.

RYU: Eh, they had more of a chance last time.This year was just pathetic.

KEN: I know!

RALF: *walks into locker room holding back*Oh, my back…

CLARK: *follows in suit*Oh my head…

RALF: How could we have lost?

CLARK: Beats me…

RALF: Lets just hope Leona's match goes alright for her…

RYU: *notices Eliza in the locker room with Mel*

ELIZA: Mel, why don't you walk around and get some autographs, okay?

MEL: Alright mom!*runs off*

ELIZA: *runs over to the shower room*Ready or not, here I come boys!*runs in*

DAN: *from shower* YAHOOI!

RYU: *confused look on face*Ken?

KEN: Yea?What's the matter Ryu?

RYU: Eh…nevermind.

IScene shifts to women's locker room/I

KING: *drinking wine*Heh, heh…HICKUP!

YURI: C'mon!Let me have some, King!

KING: No no no, little girl…too young…I can't do that HICKUP!Heh heh…

YURI: Little girl?I'm 24 years old!

KING: …MY WINE!YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY!*hugging bottle tightly*

YURI: *sighs*…*walks over to where Mai is*

MAI: What do you think?Does this outfit make my boobs look too small?

CHUN LI: No way!How about mine?

MAI: Yours is perfect…you know, you look different this year.

CHUN LI: Really?Hmm…

BLUE MARY: Hey you guys…how about me?

MAI: You look beautiful, Tiger!*slyly smiles*

BLUE MARY: Thank you, baby!You look wonderful yourself.*slyly smiles back*

CHUN LI: *confused*

IScene moves to the battle arena, where Leona is about to battle/I

ANNOUNCER: This is the fifth qualifying round for the Capcom vs SNK 2 tourney!In this corner, weighing in at—

LEONA: HEY!Don't you dare!

ANNOUNCER: Sorry.Representing the Ikari team from SNK's side…LEONA!

CROWD: Yey!Yeah!Woo-hoo!

MAN IN CROWD: Shake that thang, Leona!

LEONA: *annoyed*

MAN IN CROWD: How 'bout giving me some lovin', baby?

LEONA: *getting upset*

MAN IN CROWD: I got your King of Fighters right here!

LEONA: *turns around and walks up to man in crowd* …Here.

MAN IN CROWD: What is this?

LEONA: An earring of mine…take it as a souvenir.

MAN IN CROWD: Wow, thanks toots!*smacks Leona's ass as she walks away*

LEONA: *returns to corner pissed off*

MAN IN CROWD: Wow, check it out.A souvenir from Leona!It's so—*man explodes*

LEONA: Heh heh…

ANNOUNCER: And in THIS corner, representing the Capcom side…MEGAMAN!

MEGAMAN: *warps in*

LEONA: I have to fight…him?Ha ha ha…

MEGAMAN: *in little girl's voice*What's the matter, bitch?Scared I might win?

LEONA: Wha-wha-what!?!

MEGAMAN: I'm gonna tear you up!

LEONA: We'll see about that.

ANNOUNCER: READY…BEGIN!

MEGAMAN: Mega Buster!*starts firing shots at Leona*

LEONA: Eep!*Dodges*

MEGAMAN: *jumping in at Leona*Hya!!!

LEONA: Take this!*moon slashes Megaman*

MEGAMAN: Oww!Why you—

LEONA: And now, for the finish!V-Slasher!*performs V-Slasher on Megaman*

MEGAMAN: Nooooo!*falls to ground*

ANNOUNCER: Is Megaman finished?It looks like he can't get up!

LEONA: Pfft…what kind of match was that?*starts walking away*

MEGAMAN: *staggering to one knee*Now…you've done it…I'm mad!

LEONA: *turns around*What are you gonna do about it?

MEGAMAN: I'll use my cheapest move ever!*Breast-plate opens, revealing speaker*

LEONA: *gasp*YOU WOULDN'T!?

MEGAMAN: On the contrary…I SOOO would!

ANNOUNCER: Oh no folks!We've only heard about this tactic before, but have never seen it used!

LEONA: *starts charging Megaman*I won't let you!!!!!!!

MEGAMAN: *music begins to play from speaker*

LEONA: NOOOOO!!!!!!!!*dives in slow motion towards Megaman*

MEGAMAN: Hahahahaha!!!!!

SPEAKER: "SUPER FIGHTING ROBOT….MEGAMAN!"

LEONA: *falls to ground, clutching ears* NO! NO! NO!

SPEAKER: "SUPER FIGHTING ROBOT….MEGAMAN!SUPER FIGHTING ROBOT….MEGAMAN! 

LEONA: *losing consciousness*No…that…horrible theme song…can't…go…on…

ANNOUNCER: It's working folks! That song is SOOO bad, it's knocking Leona unconscious!

SPEAKER: "SUPER FIGHTING ROBOT….MEGAMAN!FIGHTING TO SAVE….THE WORLD!WORLD!WORLD!WORLD!" 

LEONA: *passes out*

MEGAMAN: Yey!

ANNOUNCER: And it looks like our winner is MEGAMAN!!!

MEGAMAN: *kneels down before Leona*I guess it's time to see what power I'll get from you!*puts hand on Leona's forehead*

ANNOUNCER: Looks like Megaman's taking Leona's powers.A classic move.

MEGAMAN: *begins flashing* I GOT…RIOT OF THE BLOOD???What's that?

ANNOUNCER: Megaman looks confused, folks.

MEGAMAN: Hmm, let me try out this weapon.*changes to a dark pink-like color* Hey, this feels kinda—

IORI: *by snack table* Here it goes again…

MEGAMAN: Grrrrrowl!!!!*hunches over, spouting out gas and foaming at the mouth*Kill…KILL….KILLLLLLL!!!!

ANNOUNCER: Oh no folks!Looks like Megaman took Leona's Riot of the Blood power!

MEGAMAN: *blasts hole in side of stadium* GRROWWWWL!!!*starts chasing some people out of the stadium*

ANNOUNCER: Ummm…I guess they BOTH lose!Both Leona and Megaman will NOT be in the Capcom vs SNK 2 tourney.

IORI: Only a weak, pathetic fool would let the Riot of the Blood take them over so easily!*turns to table*HEY!I want that doughnut!

TODO: ASK FOR IT WITH YOUR POWER!

IORI: *turns into Riot of the Blood* GRRRRROWWWWL!!!!

TODO: …GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!*throws doughnut at Iori's head, and starts running*

IORI: KILLLLL!!!!*chases after Todo*

TODO: Damn dress…it's so hard to run with this thing on!

bIt seems that Leona AND Megaman both couldn't make it to the Capcom vs SNK 2 tourney.Will Megaman be able to stop his Riot of Blood power?Who else will make it to the actual tournament?And when will Ken find out about his wife?/b

KEN: What about my wife?

bNevermind./b

KEN: Nah, c'mon, tell me!

bI SAID NEVERMIND!/b

KEN: *shyly*…okay…


	3. BATTLE OF THE DESCIPLES

CHAPTER 3: SHINGO AND SAKURA GET IT ON

CHAPTER 3: BATTLE OF THE DESCIPLES

bIt's the second day, and the qualifying rounds are already in progress.Ryu, Ken, Terry, and Kyo have already made it to the actual tourney.Mai, Chun Li, Iori, and Guile have all competed today, and won.We also saw Megaman beat Leona yesterday, but turned Riot of the Blood, and was disqualified for going on a rampage.We now join our fighters in the next, upcoming matchup.

In the men's locker room/b

RYO: DAMNIT!Todo's hogging the bathroom stall again!*bangs on door*

TODO: *from inside stall*Hmm…he is here…

RYO: Don't you start that crap with me again!I'm sick of it!I need to use the bathroom NOW!

TODO: *from inside stall*ASK FOR IT WITH YOUR—

RYO: *punches hole in stall, and rips Todo out, holding him by his neck*You were saying?

TODO: …I was saying *pokes Ryo's eye, 3 Stooges style*

RYO: OWWWWW, my eye!*drops Todo*

TODO: Hahahahaha!*runs off with his pants around his ankles*

RYO: AHHHH!MY EYE!IT HURTS!

IRyu and Ken are seen conversing on a bench/I

KEN: This blows…we have to sit around here for the next few days, before we can REALLY battle.

RYU: Patience is a virtue, Ken.

KEN: Yea, it's also a bitch!

RYU: True.

KEN: True.

DAN: *pops up behind Ken*WASSSSAAAA—

KEN: *back-fists Dan*

ISagat is shown warming up/I

SAGAT: Hya!Ha!Tiger!*destroys sandbag*

RYO: *walking by Sagat*

SAGAT: AH!A fellow fighter with an eye patch!I thought both of your eyes were good though.

RYO: Damn Todo poked me in the eye!I'm gonna need this for a few days.

SAGAT: Maybe you should keep it on all the time.

RYO: What for?My eye's still good.

SAGAT: Yea, but chicks dig the patch!

RYO: Get outta here!

SAGAT: No really…here, check this out.*takes off eye patch*

RYO: Ewww…

SAGAT: *walks up to blonde girl, standing in the men's locker room* Excuse me, what's your name?

ELIZA: Eliza *turns around*…eww, get away from me.

SAGAT: *turns to Ryo*Now watch THIS!*puts patch back on*Excuse me?

ELIZA: I thought I told you to *turns around*…OH MY!You're so damn sexy!Take me right now!

SAGAT: Give me a sec, babe.

ELIZA: Okay!

SAGAT: *walks back up to Ryo*See what I mean?

RYO: …yea, I guess so…but c'mon, that's Ken's wife!She'll do anybody!

SAGAT: Maybe so…but you DID see how she rejected me at first, right?

RYO: You got a point…okay Mr. Sagat, thanks for the tip!

SAGAT: No problem kid!*picks up Eliza and runs off*

IIn the women's locker room/I

KING: *snoring loudly*

YURI: She's been drunk for two days now…you think she'll be ready for her match-up tomorrow?

MAI: *feeling Mary up* …oh, um, sure!

BLUE MARY: *feeling back*

YURI: Hey, um, can I ask you guys a question?

BLUE MARY: Shoot, kid.

YURI: Are you guys…ya know…

MAI: Are we what?

YURI: Ya know…

BLUE MARY: What?

YURI: …nevermind.

MAI: Eh, okay!*feels Mary up more*

YURI: *shaking head and walks off*

IScene moves to the battle arena/I

ANNOUNCER: The next qualifying match will be between Yun and Yang!And here they come.

YUN: Are you ready?

YANG: Yes…let's do this!

YUN: …

YANG: …

YUN: ONE!

YANG: TWO!

YUN AND YANG: THREE!

YUN: *shown with Paper*

YANG: *shown with Rock*

ANNOUNCER: Oh my, folks!It looks like Yun has won this mighty battle!

YUN: Sorry brother.

YANG: …

IA half hour later/I

ANNOUNCER: Alrighty folks!Here comes the next match-up!Sakura Kasugano vs Shingo Yabuki!The battle between the disciples!

SHINGO: Dunn-dah-da!

SAKURA: *shaking head*Prepare for defeat!

SHINGO: I think not, Yuri!

SAKURA: Yuri!?!?!

SHINGO: Uh…yea…that IS your name, isn't it?

SAKURA: _…

ANNOUNCER: OH NO, FOLKS!Looks like Shingo did the worst thing you could ever do to Sakura…he called her Yuri!

SHINGO: Sak…u…ra?Ah, you must be from Crapcom!Wahahaha!

SAKURA: ….DIIIIIIEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

SHINGO: Uh oh…

ANNOUNCER: And it looks like the match has already begun!Shingo did the worst thing he could ever do…he pissed off an anime girl!And you know what that means…

SAKURA: *pulls out giant mallet*

ANNOUNCER: YES!It's the classic giant mallet!

SAKURA: *slams mallet into Shingo's head*

SHINGO: OWWW!!!

SAKURA: Take this! *kicks*And this!*punches*And this!SHINKUU-HADOUKEN!*blows Shingo away*

SHINGO: *breathing heavily*I'm…gonna…lose…

SAKURA: AHHHHH!!!*charging Shingo*

SHINGO: I WILL NOT LOSE!*kicks Sakura in the crotch*

SAKURA: *grabs crotch, and falls to knees, screaming*

SHINGO: (o_o)

ANNOUNCER: (o_o)

AUDIENCE: (o_o)

SHINGO: I…umm…I'm…sorry…I didn't know…you had a pair…of those…

SAKURA: ………HYA!*super dragon punches Shingo, right in the crotch*I DON'T!

SHINGO: *flying through air, holding crotch*(o_o)*lands in the stands*

ANNOUNCER:…Oh my…what a vicious attack.A wise man would NOT have messed with this girl!And our winner is Sakura!

SAKURA: I fooled you all, didn't I?I don't have a pair of THOSE!

SHINGO: *staggering to feet*Yea…you're right…you DON'T have a pair of…BREASTS!

SAKURA: (o_o)

ANNOUNCER: Oh no folks…Shingo's GOT to learn that you do NOT joke about small breasts!

SAKURA: YOU WILL FEEL MY WRATH!*running after Shingo*

SHINGO: Aiiiieeee!*runs off*

bSakura wipes the floor with Shingo, and makes it to the Capcom vs SNK 2 tourney!Will Shingo be able to evade Sakura's "wrath"?Will Andy and Terry find out what's been going on between Mai and Blue Mary?Will Ryo be able to pick up a chick with his newly acquired eye patch?And for the love of Pete, will Ken stop being so naive?/b

KEN: About what?

bYour wife, man!Your wife!/b

KEN: Look, stop talking about my wife, scumbag!If you don't, I'm gonna kick the crap out of you!

bI'd like to see you try!/b

KEN: *breaks into narrator's booth*

bUh oh…/b


	4. ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER QUALIFYING ROUND

bThe third day of qualifying rounds is coming to a close

CHAPTER 4: ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER QUALIFYING ROUND

bThe third day of qualifying rounds is coming to a close.The current list of warriors that have made it goes as follows:Capcom = Ryu, Ken, Chun Li, E. Honda, Blanka, Cammy, Guile, Sagat, Bison, Vega, Balrog, Yun, and Sakura.SNK = Kyo, Iori, Terry, Mai, King, Yuri, Raiden, Athena, Benimaru, Chang, Kim, Joe, and Todo.Last time, Yun beat Yang in a monster battle…of rock, paper, and scissors.And Sakura whipped the living snot out of Shingo as well.Let's continue on to part 4!

In the men's locker room/b

RYO: *looking around for Todo*Damnit, he's not here!

SAGAT: *slaps Ryo on back*Hey man!How did it go yesterday with that patch on?

RYO: Well, I got pretty lucky actually.Two woman in one night!

SAGAT: Way to go, buddy!

RYO: Yea, the only problem is that it was almost impossible to get them to leave!

SAGAT: What can I say, man?Chicks dig the patch.

RYO: I guess you're right…but in all honesty, I wanna get this thing off as soon as possible.Last thing I need is to turn into another Ukyo.

UKYO: *runs in panting*I've…been…running…for three…weeks now.Someone please help me!

GIRLS: *run into locker room*There he is, girls!Get him!

UKYO: AHHHH!!!I HATE THOSE FRIGGIN' GIRLS!*runs off*

GIRLS: *trample Ryo and Sagat, as they chase Ukyo*

SAGAT: Ugh…you figure they would have let up by now.

RYO: Uh…I know…

IRyu and Ken are seen talking/I

RYU: Damn Ken, what happened to you?

KEN: That damn narrator kicked the crap out of me!

RYU: Well c'mon, he IS the narrator.

KEN: What's that supposed to mean?

RYU: He's the guy who tells the story…he's more powerful than any of us!

KEN: I'm not scared of him!He wasn't that tough!I let him win!

RYU: Man, don't piss him off Ken…he can do some pretty horrible things…

KEN: No!Where are you, narrator!?!C'mon you pansy school girl!

bPansy school girl?You little fool!I will now make sure you never again test my power!*clears throat*To his horror, Ken realizes that he's actually a woman!What an interesting story twist, folks!/b

KEN: Wha?I'm not a girl!*opens his gi up*AH!*sees giant cleavage*

RYU: *staring at Ken's breasts*Whoa, Ken…I never knew…

KEN: No!No!No!This can't be happening!*looks in pants*NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

RYU: That's gotta hurt his pride…

IIn the women's locker room/I

MAKI: *walks in, panting*Whew, I finally made it into the tournament!

CHUN LI: Good job, Maki.

MAI: Yup.Good work.

MAKI: Thanks you guys!

CHUN LI: There's something awkward about your fighting style though.

MAKI: *nervous* Eh, heh heh…what do you mean?

CHUN LI: It reminds me a lot of Guy's.I know you got your own moves and all but—

MAI: Yea!I noticed that too!Did you guys train together?

MAKI: No…I just kinda…mimicked his moves.Yea, that's it.I mimicked them.

CHUN LI: Oh…okay.Well, anyways, good job.

MAI: See ya later.*walks off with Chun Li*

MAKI: Whew.That was close.*walks into the shower*

KING: I'm just finishing up…heard you won.

MAKI: *undressing* Yup…proud of myself.

KING: *drying off*Glad to hear it.I'll see you later.*leaves shower*

MAKI: *turns on hot water* Feels good…

YURI: *walking by* Oh there's Maki!I want to congratulate her on the win!

MAKI: *turns into Guy*

YURI: (o_o)

GUY: Nobody must know my terrible secret…damn that Ranma and his practical jokes!*walks off*

YURI: (o_o)…oh…my…god…

IUkyo is seen cowering in a corner of the men's locker room/I

UKYO: No…please…don't…

GIRL 1: We've got you now, baby!

GIRL 2: Yea!You're not getting away THIS time!

UKYO: Noo!*covers face as girls approach*

RYO: Hey, what's going on here?

GIRL 1: Huh!Oh my!

RYO: What?

GIRL 2: Look at THAT hunk! Forget Ukyo, get HIM girls!

RYO: Oh no!*runs away*

GIRLS: *chasing after Ryo*

UKYO: *looks up*Whew…I owe you one, Ryo.

RYO: *shouting back at Ukyo while running* YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT, YOU DO, YOU BASTARD!

IScene shifts to the battle arena/I

ANNOUNCER: Welcome back, folks!This is the last battle of the evening, an surprisingly enough, it's a tag team match up!In this corner, representing Samurai Showdown…Haohmaru and Nakaruru!

HAOHMARU: *walks in*Whoa…what time period IS this?

NAKARURU: *walks in* Beats me, big guy.

HAOHMARU: How did we get here, anyways?

NAKARURU: I'm here cuz people loooove me!^_^As for you…maybe they wanted another Samurai Showdown person.

HAOHMARU: Hey!People like me!

NAKARURU: Pfft!People may "like" you, but people "looooove" me!

HAOHMARU: We'll see about that!*walks in front of crowd*Hey!If you like Haohmaru, give me a hell yeah!

ONE MAN IN CROWD: HELL YEA!

HAOHMARU: One person?

NAKARURU: And if you loooove me…give me a BIG cheer!^_^

CROWD: Woooo!Yea!Go Nakaruru!

HAOHMARU: Damn you and that cute face of yours!

ANNOUNCER:And in this corner, representing Star Gladiator…Hayato and June!

HAYATO: *riding in on motorcycle* Woo-hoo!

JUNE: Careful Hayato…

HAYATO: Don't worry about it!*jumps off motorcycle with June, as motorcycle flies into crowd*

CROWD: Ahh!*motorcycle explodes, killing people*

HAYATO: Oops…

JUNE: Sorry!

ANNOUNCER: We have more crowd deaths here than any Stock Car racing event!Ready fighters!?FIGHT!

HAYATO: Prepare to get your asses kicked!AHHH!*runs at Haohmaru*

JUNE: Umm…yea!*runs in at Nakaruru*

HAYATO: Hya!*Slicing Haohmaru with his plasma sword*

HAOHMARU: Damn, that burns!But what's with your sword?

HAYATO: What do you mean?

HAOHMARU: Well, for starters…IT SUCKS!

HAYATO: Oh yea?And your piece of ancient history is better?

HAOHMARU: It's much more effective!*slices Hayato in half*

HAYATO: (o_o)This is a Capcom game…I can't die?*dies*

NAKARURU: Hmm…bird or wolf?Bird or wolf?I can't decide…

JUNE: Aiiiiie!

NAKARURU: Let's go with wolf.*sends wolf out on June*

JUNE: Eep!*runs out of stadium, with wolf chasing her*

ANNOUNCER: And it looks like Haohmaru and Nakaruru are both making it to the Capcom vs SNK 2 tourney!Congratulations!

bHaohmaru and Nakaruru both make it to the actual tourney!Will Ryo be able to outrun the sex-starved women?Will everyone find out about Maki's "secret"?And what about—/b

KEN: *walks into narrators booth*

bWhat do you want?/b

KEN: C'mon man…kicking my ass is one thing.Changing me into a woman is going TOO far though.Change me back.

bNope…not until I see fit to change you back/b

KEN: C'mon guy…please?

bStay tuned for part 5, folks!/b

KEN: *under breath* You suck…

bWhat was that?/b

KEN: Nothing!


	5. WEIRD STUFF IS GOIN DOWN

bIt's the fourth day of qualifying rounds and we already have a huge list of contenders that will be in the CvS2 Tourney

CHAPTER 5: WEIRD STUFF IS GOIN' DOWN

bIt's the fourth day of qualifying rounds and we already have a huge list of contenders that will be in the CvS2 Tourney.The list of qualifiers so far is:Capcom = Ryu, Ken, Chun Li, E. Honda, Blanka, Cammy, Guile, Sagat, Bison, Vega, Balrog, Yun, Sakura, and Maki.SNK = Kyo, Iori, Terry, Mai, King, Yuri, Raiden, Athena, Benimaru, Chang, Kim, Joe, Todo, Haohmaru, and Nakaruru.Also, yesterday, we saw Haohmaru and Nakaruru kill off Hayato(SG) and chase off June.Now, let's begin part 5!

In the men's locker room/b

RYO: *looking around cautiously*Whew, I think I lost 'em.Jeez, now I know how Ukyo feels.*sits on a bench next to Iori*

IORI: *drinking a beer*

RYO: *begins reading a book*

IORI: *drinking beer*

RYO: *reading book*

IORI: *drinking beer*

RYO: *reading book*

IORI: *turns to Ryo*WHO'RE YOU CALLING A PSYCHO?!

RYO: *gets scared, stands up, and backs away from Iori*

IIn the female's locker room/I

YURI: *walks up to Sakura* Hi Sakura.

SAKURA: Hello Yuri.What's going on?

YURI: Um, I need to talk with you about something.

SAKURA: Sure, what is it?

YURI: It's about Maki…I think there's something weird about her…

SAKURA: You too?Man, I thought I was the only one.

YURI: So you know about "it" too?

SAKURA: Yea.Those breasts have GOT to be fake.

YURI: Yea, I…no wait, that's not it.

SAKURA: What is it then?

YURI: Sakura…I think Maki is really Guy.

SAKURA: You think she's a guy!?

YURI: Not "a" Guy…I mean the fighter, Guy.

SAKURA: How do you know?She looks like a woman to me.

YURI: Well, yesterday, I saw her get into the shower…and she transformed into Guy!

SAKURA: …

YURI: I'm not kidding!

SAKURA: Yuri…you sure you weren't tripping on that weed Chin gave you?

YURI: Shhh!Not so loud.

SAKURA: Why?It's just us girls in here.

YURI: Sakura, you said "Yuri" and "weed" in the same sentence…you know what that means, don't you?

SAKURA: No…what does it mean?*ground starts shaking violently*What the hell's going on?!

YURI:*smacks her forehead*That's what it means.*looks over at the women's locker room door as Takuma and Ryo storm in*

TAKUMA: YURIIIII!!!!YOU'VE BEEN SMOKING MARIJUANA AGAIN!?WHAT HAVE WE TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT!?

RYO: YEA!*looks at the girls in the locker room*…oh no…

KING: *hickup*It's Ryo!

CHUN LI: He's such a babe!

CHIZURU: Get 'im girls!

RYO: Not again!*runs away in terror*

GIRLS: *give chase*

TAKUMA: YURI, YOU HAVE DISAPPOINTED ME.YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS DON'T YOU?I WILL HAVE TO CLENSE YOU OF YOUR WAYS.

YURI: Oh no dad…*grabs his arm*…not another speech!

TAKUMA: YES!I MUST INFORM YOU ONCE AGAIN ON THE DANGERS OF DRUG USAGE!*grabs Yuri by the hand*WE'RE GOING TO BE IN FOR A LOOOONG TALK, DAUGHTER!

YURI: *mouthing "Help me" to Sakura as she's being dragged out*

IBack in the men's locker room/I

KEN: *pacing back and forth*Damnit!Ryu, what am I gonna do?

RYU: *staring at Ken's bouncing cleavage*Um…I…don't know Ken.

KEN: I guess I'm gonna have to trick the narrator into turning me back…but how?

RYU: *still staring*…don't know…

KEN: Aha!I got it!I'll be right back Ryu!*turns around, and starts to run off*

RYU: Hey Ken, wait a sec!

KEN: *turns around, and runs back to Ryu while cleavage is still bouncing*Yea buddy?

RYU: *staring with a smile on his face*…dang, I forgot…

KEN: Okay.*starts to run off*

RYU: Oh, now I remember!

KEN: *turns around, and again runs to Ryu while cleavage is bouncing*Go ahead.

RYU: *staring with an even bigger smile*Crap, forgot again.

KEN: Look man, I gotta get myself changed back soon!So stop goofing around, ok?

RYU: *smiling* Okay.

KEN: What's so funny?

RYU: Nothing.

KEN: Alright.See ya later.*runs off*

RYU: *grin becomes even bigger, and opens the nearest bathroom stall*

TODO: *inside stall*HEY!

RYU: Whoops, sorry!I needed to use this.

TODO: DID YOU ASK FOR IT WITH YOUR POWER?!

RYU: No, I—

TODO: THEN LEAVE ME!*continues reading his Game Informer magazine*

RYU: Jeez.*begins smiling again**opens the next stall door and walks in*

IIn the women's locker room once again/I

YURI: *walks in 5 hours later, wearing a D.A.R.E. t-shirt*

SAKURA: Hey, sorry about that Yuri.I didn't know.

YURI: …..

SAKURA: Are you mad at me?

YURI: *in a Mr. Mackey voice*…drugs are bad…

SAKURA: Oh no…he's hypnotized you!

YURI: …drugs are bad…drugs are bad…

SAKURA: *smacks Yuri*

YURI: ……what happened?

SAKURA: Your dad gave you a speech on drugs, remember?

YURI: Yea, actually I do…

SAKURA: Sorry about that.I didn't know.How did he hear us anyhow?

YURI: *whispering to Sakura*My dad and bro are friends with the narrator of this story.Everything I say, they get a written transcript of it immediately.

SAKURA: Oh…

YURI: Which reminds me…we have to go later to see Chin.

SAKURA: Yea, we need to pick up some we—

YURI: *clasps hand on Sakura's mouth*Don't say it!

SAKURA: Oops, sorry.

IBack in the men's locker room/I

AKUMA: *drinking coffee*

RYO: *runs in, breathing heavily*

AKUMA: *looks over at Ryo*

RYO: *walks up to Akuma* Hey Akuma, what's up?

AKUMA: Me Suit!

RYO: *grabs a cup of coffee*Come off it Akuma, you don't need to be using your "Me Suit" language around me.

AKUMA: …not much really.Why are you so tired?

RYO: I keep being chased around by sex-starved women.

AKUMA: *takes a sip of coffee*Ah, I know how that is…

RYO: No you don't.I haven't seen ANY women around you at any point in time!*sips coffee*

AKUMA: HEY!WOMEN DIG THE ME SUIT, MAN!Anyways, I meant I know what it's like to be chased around by someone who's insanely crazy…or in your case, a group of people…*sips coffee*

RYO: Really?*sips coffee*

AKUMA: Yup…hopefully, he won't find me in here…that guy scares me…

RYO: Who is it?

RUGAL: *bursts into locker room* I have you now, Demon Man!

AKUMA: Him!*points at Rugal*

RUGAL: I will have your powers!

AKUMA: *in an Irish accent*He's always after me powers!*Shun Goku Satsu's out of the locker room on a rainbow*

RUGAL: *runs up to Ryo*He's magically delicious!*thinks about what he said*Never mind I said that.*runs out of the locker room*

RYO: He's…magically delicious?!

Back in the women's locker room/I

MAKI: *sitting on a bench, lifting weights*

YURI: *walks up to Maki*Hello Maki.

MAKI: *looks up*Oh hi, Sakura.What's going on?

YURI: Nothing, I was just…

MAKI: You were just what?

YURI: HEY!You called me Sakura!

MAKI: Oops, my bad.*giggles*Sorry.*continues lifting dumbell*

YURI: NOBODY CALLS ME SAKURA!

MAKI: *puts weight down*Calm down, ok?It was an accident.

YURI: BITCH!

MAKI: *gets angry*There's no need for calling names!I apologized and you're acting mean to me.

YURI: BUT YOU CALLED ME SAKURA!

MAKI: Look, why don't you just piss off?You're PMS'ing.*gets up and starts to walk away*

YURI: I wouldn't leave so soon if I were you, Guy.

MAKI: *looks shocked*What did you say!?

YURI: *clears throat* I need everyone's attention!!!

MAKI: *watches as all the women turn and look in their direction*

YURI: It seems that ONE of us here is NOT really a woman!

GIRLS: Gasp!

MORRIGAN: *tears fill in eyes*IT'S TRUE!I'M NOT A WOMAN!*unzips her skin from her head to her crotch as E. Honda pops out*There, are you happy Yuri!?Whaa!*cries as he runs out of the room*

GIRLS: (o_o)

YURI: (o_o)*shakes her head*Okay, I guess TWO of us aren't women.Morrigan…and MAKI!

GIRLS: Gasp!

MAKI: What are you saying!?

YURI: I know that you are really Guy!

MAKI: *becomes scared*

CHUN LI: Is this true Maki?

MAKI: Well, I—

MAI: No way, Chun.It can't be.Me and Blue Mary know for a FACT that she's a women. Right Mary?*smiles at Blue Mary*

BLUE MARY: Yea baby.*walks off with Mai*

CHUN LI: Jesus Yuri, what's your problem!?Making false accusations like that.*walks away as the group of girls begins scattering*

YURI: It's true!She magically changed into Guy!I saw it!

KING: *from the back of the room**hickup*Sure thing, pothead!

YURI: HEY, I HEARD THAT!*turns to Maki*I won't let you get away with this!

MAKI: *gives a dirty smile*I'd like to see you try and stop me, stoner!*walks away*

SAKURA: *runs up by Yuri's side*So what if Yuri smokes grass?Lay off, Maki!

YURI: *smacks her forehead*

SAKURA: Uh oh…that was bad wasn't it?

YURI: *nods as she sees Takuma burst in*

TAKUMA: DAUGHTER!!!GET READY!

YURI: No daddy!*drops to knees*Not another speech!

TAKUMA: YES!ANOTHER AND ANOTHER!*grabs Yuri by her foot as he drags her out*

YURI: Nooooooo!!!!

SAKURA: Sucks to be her.

bWowee!No fighting at all today!Don't worry fans, there will be plenty of fighting in the next one!Anyways, will Ryo be able to continually outrun the women?Will Yuri actually prove to everyone that Maki is Guy?And what of Ken?What is his plan to trick me into changing him back?This and more in Chapter 6!/b


	6. THE END OF THE QUALIFYING ROUNDS

CHAPTER 6: THE END OF THE QUALIFYING ROUNDS Dante Conforti Normal Dante Conforti 1 1 2001-10-21T02:19:00Z 2001-10-21T02:20:00Z 6 1904 10856 Self 90 21 13331 9.2720 

CHAPTER 6: THE END OF THE QUALIFYING ROUNDS

bThe fifth and final day of qualifying rounds has already begun!  There are only a few more fights left, the most notable being Dan vs Robert!  Yesterday, we saw Yuri attempt to disclose Maki's secret to everyone!  Also, Ken was formulating a plan to get me to change him back (like it's really gonna work anyhow).  Let's continue on, as we begin chapter 6 in our story!

In the men's locker room/b

RYO: *takes his eye patch off and examines the eye in the mirror*  Alright!  I can see with this eye again!  No more of this eye patch for me.  *goes to throw the patch away*

SAGAT: *walking by*  Hey Ryo, what're you up to?

RYO: I'm gonna throw this god-awful patch away!

SAGAT: How come?

RYO: I'm sick of being chased by women left and right.

SAGAT: Well, you don't have to wear it all the time…just wear it when you "need" it, if you catch my drift.

RYO: Hmm…I guess you're right.  *puts patch away in his pocket*  Thanks Sagat.

SAGAT: Not a problem, little buddy.  By the way, I think I saw Todo out in the hall earlier. 

RYO: Really?!  Alright, now it's payback time!  *smacks fists, and walks out of the locker room*

IIn Robert Garcia's office/I

ROBERT: Ken, we got a bit of a problem.

KEN: Yea?  *sitting with his legs open*

ROBERT: …um…Ken…could you not do that, please?

KEN: Huh?  *looks down*  EEP!  *crosses legs*  Damn that narrator!

ROBERT: So he isn't gonna change you back, yet?

KEN: No, but I know how to fix him.  Heh heh…

ROBERT: You know…that body and that voice…it's kinda sexy…

KEN: Wha?!  Aren't you and Yuri—

ROBERT: Yea…yea…

KEN: *clears throat*  Anyways, what is our problem?

ROBERT: Oh, well, our current announcer is quitting, so we need to have auditions.  We need a new announcer for the actual CvS2 tourney.

KEN: You think you can scrounge up some people?

ROBERT: I think so…meet me back here in a few hours, and we'll have the auditions then.

KEN: Alright.  *uncrosses legs*

ROBERT: AH!  DON'T DO THAT!

KEN: Whoops, sorry.  *gets up and leaves*

IIn the women's locker room/I

MAKI: *practicing with a sandbag*  Hya!  Ha!

SAKURA: Umm…so what are we doing exactly, Yuri?

YURI: We're going to prove to everyone that Maki is really Guy.

SAKURA: How do you plan on doing that?

YURI: Simple…with this bucket of cold water.

SAKURA: …are you sure you're not h—

YURI: *puts hand over Sakura's mouth*  Don't you dare say it!  You want another escapade with my dad?

SAKURA: *muffled*  No.

YURI: Alright, good.

SAKURA: But why do I have this video camera, Yuri?

YURI: I wanna show everyone in this building what Maki's secret is!

SAKURA: So we're broadcasting live at the moment?

YURI: Yup.  *walks up to where Maki is practicing*

MAKI: *turns to Yuri*  What do you want?  You came to apologize to me?

YURI: Nope, in fact, I'm gonna prove to everybody that you're really Guy.

MAKI: Not again, Yuri.  What are you going to do this time?

YURI: You'll see.  *clears throat*  Can I have everyone's attention please!

GIRLS: *turn and walk to where Yuri, Maki, and Sakura are*

CROWD: *looks at the huge screen in the arena to see what's going on*

CHUN LI: What is it now, Yuri?

YURI: I'm going to prove to you, once and for all, that Maki REALLY IS GUY!

MAI: Oh no, not again Yuri.

MAKI: What do you plan on doing?!  *getting nervous*

YURI: Everyone, I saw what happens when water hits Maki…it changes her into Guy!

GIRLS: Gasp!

YURI: And with this video camera, I'll prove it to everyone in this building!

MAKI: WHAT?!  You can't be serious…I'm wearing my white outfit today!  Don't do it!

YURI: Shuddap!  Just watch this, everyone!  *grabs bucket of COLD water*  Take this, 

GUY!  

MAKI: Yuri, NOOOO!

YURI: *throws water at Maki*

MAKI: Ahh!  *gets splashed*

GIRLS: *watching*

YURI: *watching*

SAKURA: *watching*

CROWD: *watching*

MAKI: (o_o)  *looks down and sees that her dress is see-through now(she's not wearing any under garments either)*

YURI: I…don't understand…the cold water should have done it…

CHUN LI: YURI!  HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO POOR MAKI!

MEN IN CROWD: WOO-HOO!  *falling over with nosebleeds*

MAKI: Yuri…*sniffling*

MAI: Come on, Maki…me and Blue Mary will give you comfort.  *winks at Mary*

BLUE MARY: *winks back*  Yuri, you should be ashamed of yourself!

MAI: Let's go, Maki.  *walks off with Maki and Blue Mary*

YURI: …

CHUN LI: Yuri…*scoffs and walks away*

GIRLS: You suck, Yuri!  *starts throwing towels at Yuri*

SAKURA: So what if Yuri sucks!  A lot of women do that with guys!

YURI: (o_o)

SAKURA: Oh…you guys didn't mean it in that way, did you?  Oops.

YURI: GYA!  *grabs huge anime-style mallet and smashes Sakura with it*

SAKURA: *twitching*

TAKUMA: *bursts into locker room*  DAUGHTER!!!!!

YURI: *gets dragged out by her feet again*  NOOOO!!!!

IBack in the men's locker room/I

RYO: *walks in, trying to catch his breath*  Damnit!  That Todo is one fast bastard.  *looking around*  Where can he be?

SAGAT: *walks up to Ryo*  Hey, you find Todo yet?

RYO: Yea, but he outran me.  He's somewhere in here though.

SAGAT: Why not check out the bathroom stalls…he seems to be there a lot.

RYO: Good thinking, Sagat!  *runs off*

SAGAT: At least…I think he might be there…*walks off*

IIn Robert Garcia's office again/I

ROBERT: Alright Ken, I found a few people for the auditions.

KEN: Cool, send 'em in.

ROBERT: Number one, could you please come in now?

ANNOUNCER 1: *walks in*

KEN: Go ahead, show us what you got.

ANNOUNCER 1: Beat him up, guy!  Triumph or die!  Go for broke!  You can't give it up…go for it, man!

ROBERT: Umm…we'll call you…

KEN: Next!

ANNOUNCER 2: Leady?  Goh!  Puhfect!  Winna!  Lobert!

KEN: Eh…come back when you learn to pronounciate better.

ROBERT: Next!

ANNOUNCER 3: Muhahaha!  Flawless victory!  Muhahaha!  FINISH HIM!  Muhahaha!

KEN: Look man, we're not looking to actually KILL each other here.

ROBERT: Yea, maybe you should just go.

ANNOUNCER 3: Muhahaha!  But I don't have a job!  Muhahaha!  My last game series went under!  Muhahaha!  Please, I need this job!  Muhahaha!

KEN: …can you stop laughing like that, please?

ANNOUNCER 3: I can't stop laughing.  Muhahaha.  Please help me!  Muhahaha.

ROBERT: Security!!!  Get this guy out of here, please!

SECURITY GUARD: Right boss.  *grabs the announcer*  Let's go, man.

ANNOUNCER 3: *being dragged out*  Muhahaha!  You are a weak, pathetic fool!  Muhahaha!

SECURITY GUARD: You know, I like you man…looks like this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

ANNOUNCER 3: Friendship?  FRIENDSHIP?!  Muhahaha!  *gets dragged out*

KEN: Alright, we got one more to go…come on in, buddy.

ANNOUNCER 4: …

ROBERT: Go ahead.

ANNOUNCER 4: …

KEN: …look, will you speak already?

ANNOUNCER 4: *shyly* …ok…

KEN: *watching*

ROBERT: *watching*

ANNOUNCER 4: Ahem.  *clears throat* …All records are meant to be broken!  This is the tournament for the new millennium!  Hey, who let these guys in?  Live and let die!  The road to victory is not an easy one—

KEN: Alright, alright, we've heard enough!

ANNOUNCER 4: I'm sorry but once I start talking, I can't seem to stop.  I love to hear my voice.  Lala-lala-la-la!  Listen to my voice.  So do I get the job, huh?  Huh?  Wow, I can't believe how sexy my voice is.  I—

ROBERT: Yes, you have the job!  Now leave…you start on Monday, at 11 A.M. sharp.

ANNOUNCER 4: Alright!  I have the job!  I'm the man!  I love to talk!  Woo-hoo!  I'm gonna leave now, ok?  I'm walking over to the door.  I'm halfway there.  Now I'm actually there.  I'm going now.  I'll see you guys on Monday.  Boy, do I love to talk or what?  *walks out the door, while still talking to himself*

KEN: (o_o)

ROBERT: (o_o)

KEN: Well…I guess he's "okay"…I think the crowd will be able to deal with him.

ROBERT: But what if they can't?

KEN: Then…we'll just have to find a way to shut him up when he needs to be shut up.

ROBERT: Okay.

IInside the battle arena/I

ANNOUNCER: Alright folks, our last qualifying match is about to begin!

CROWD: *cheering*

ANNOUNCER: I'd like to announce first, though, that this is the last day you'll hear my voice here.

CROWD: *in unison*  Awwww!

ANNOUNCER: Don't fret though, folks…Mr. Masters and Mr. Garcia have already found a replacement for me.  And I'm sure you'll love him just as much as you loved me.

CROWD: *begin chanting*  Stay!  Stay!  Stay!  Stay!

ANNOUNCER: I can't…I'm sorry folks.

CROWD: *in unison*  Okay!

ANNOUNCER: *confused look on face*  Anyways, coming to the ring for our final qualifying match up will be Dan Hibiki and Robert Garcia!

DAN: *rolls into his corner*  YAHOOI!

ROBERT: *walks into his corner*  Yawn…this should be an easy match for me.

DAN: We'll see about that!  YAHOOI!

ROBERT: Sure thing, copycat.

DAN: WHAT?!

ANNOUNCER: READY?!  BEGIN!!!

DAN: *stares Robert down, DBZ style*

ROBERT: *stares Dan down, DBZ style*

DAN: *an hour later*  You ready?

ROBERT: Oh yea!  *rolls next to Dan*  Take this!  *does the Genei-kyaku*

DAN: AH!  *getting kicked repeatedly*

ANNOUNCER: It looks like Robert could win this match up folks.  He's got Dan caught in his patented multiple kick move…thingie.

ROBERT: Hya!  Ryuuga!  *uppercuts Dan*

DAN: AHHH!  *flies backward, and lands face first into the ground*

ROBERT: *runs at Dan, and gives him a beat down*

DAN: Argh!  *getting beat up*

ANNOUNCER: This match seems to be coming to an end folks!

ROBERT: And now, for the finish!  RYUUKO RANBU!  *flies at Dan and does his multiple-hitting super move*

DAN: AHHHHHH!!!

ROBERT: HYA!  *finishes the move and sends Dan flying*

DAN: ARGGGH!!!  *lands in the stands, breaking benches and creating smoke and debri*

ROBERT: HA!  Like I said, COPYCAT, this was an easy match for me.

ANNOUNCER: Folks, it looks like our winner is—

DAN: COPYCAT?!!!!

ANNOUNCER: Wha?!

ROBERT: Wha?!

DAN: *breaks out of the rubble*  Watch who you call a copycat, bitch!

ROBERT: But…I mean…how?!

DAN: Simple…I'm more powerful this time!

ROBERT: I don't believe you!

DAN: Then check this out!  HYAAAA!!!!  *has an explosion of energy surrounding him, DBZ style*

ROBERT: ?!?!?!?!?

ANNOUNCER: Folks, it looks like Dan has more fight left in him than Robert cares to know!

DAN: FEEL THE POWER OF SAIKYO!!!  *rolls forward*  GADOUKEN!  *throws a fireball at Robert, actually hitting him!*

ROBERT: ARGH!  How can this be?!  Your fireball can't travel more than an inch or two!

DAN: Heh heh…that's what you thought!  SAIKYOOOO!!!!  *energy around him bursts up*  GYAAA!!  *rolls next to Robert*  HISSHOU BURAI-KEN!  *does his multiple-hitting super move*

ROBERT: NOOOO!!!  *flies backwards, and is knocked unconscious*

ANNOUNCER: And, in a strange turn of events, Dan is our winner!!!!

CROWD: *chanting*  SAIKYO!  SAIKYO!  SAIKYO!  YAHOOI!  YAHOOI!  YAHOOI!

DAN: YAHOOI!  I'm the man!

ANNOUNCER: It looks like that's the end of our qualifying match ups.  Let me read the list of contenders who will be competing in the real CvS2 tournament!  On the Capcom side…we have Ryu, Ken, Chun Li, E. Honda, Blanka, Cammy, Guile, Sagat, Bison, Vega, Balrog, Yun, Sakura, Maki, Rolento, Akuma, Eagle, Kyosuke, Morrigan, Zangief, Dhalsim, and Dan!  And on the SNK side…we have Kyo, Iori, Terry, Mai, King, Yuri, Raiden, Athena, Benimaru, Chang, Kim, Joe, Todo, Haohmaru, Nakoruru, Geese, Rugal, Hibiki, Vice, Yamazaki, Ryo, and Rock!  Have a nice weekend everyone, and on Monday, we'll start the real tournament!  Thank you, and good night!  *leaves*

IScene shifts back to the men's locker room/I

RYO: *runs up to the bathroom stall*  Ha ha.  I'm gonna get Todo this time.  *knocks on door*

???: *no response*

RYO: *bangs fist even harder on the door*

???: *no response*

RYO: *crouches down and peeks under the stall*  *thinking to himself*  That's the dress that Todo wears…he must have gotten a new one because this one is red…no matter, I'll make him pay for what he did to me!  *stands up*  Alright, ready or not, here I come!

???: *from inside the stall*  Huh?

RYO: HAO SHO KOHOKEN!  *throws his massive fireball, blowing away the stall and leaving rubble and smoke everywhere*  TAKE THIS!  RYUUKO RANBU!  *does his multiple-hitting super on the person in the stall*

???: GRRR!  *VERY angry*

RYO: *stands up*  Now, let's see JUST how badly I beat you, Todo!

TODO: *from behind Ryo*  What do you mean, Ryo?

RYO: *turns around*  What?!?!  Todo…if you're there…then who's—

???: *stands up, with a VERY pissed off look on his face*

RYO: *turns around slowly, and watches as the smoke clears away*  Oh no…I'm sorry Mr. Geese…I didn't mean—

GEESE: *breathing heavily and grunting*

RYO: *swallows hard*

TODO: Wahahahaha!…see you later, Ryo!  *runs away laughing hysterically*

GEESE: …I…WILL…STAINNN YOURRR HEAD WIT MYYY BUUUTTT!!

RYO: *swallows hard again*  Umm…don't you mean…I will stain MY head with YOUR butt?

GEESE: ….EXACTLY!!!  *begins laughing wickedly as he grabs Ryo by the throat*

RYO: Wait…no…I didn't mean that…no…NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

bOh my, ladies and gentlemen!  It seems that the qualifying rounds are over.  Will Yuri be able to prove to everyone that Maki is not who she says she is?  Will the new announcer be good enough for the crowd?  And what of Ryo…what will…happen to him?  *shuddering in disgust*  Stay tuned for part 7, entitled "THE TOURNAMENT BEGINS!"/b


	7. THE TOURNAMENT BEGINS!

CHAPTER 7: THE TOURNAMENT BEGINS Dante Conforti Normal Dante Conforti 1 0 2001-10-27T12:29:00Z 2001-10-27T12:30:00Z 6 1582 9019 Self 75 18 11075 9.2720 

CHAPTER 7: THE TOURNAMENT BEGINS!

bIt's the first day of the actual Capcom vs SNK 2 tourney, and it looks like our fighters are getting ready to do battle!  In our last chapter, we saw Ken and Robert choose a new announcer.  We also witnessed Maki being embarrassed live, and Robert getting his ass handed to him by Dan Hibiki.  And let's not forget Ryo…in fact, let's just see what happened to him.  On to chapter 7!

In the men's locker room/b

TERRY: So what did the doctors say?

ANDY: Because of that stupid stab injury, I'm not able to compete for another 3 months at least.

TERRY: Damn, that's a bummer.

ANDY: I know!  Well, at least you, Rock, and Joe made it in.

ROCK: (In JapaneseI can't wait 'till my first match!)

ANDY: (In JapaneseI'm sure you'll do just fine.)  Hey Terry, can I ask you a question?

TERRY: Shoot.

ANDY: Umm…you can't speak Japanese right?

TERRY: Right.

ANDY: How do you communicate with Rock then?

TERRY: Simple…whenever he speaks to me, I just give him a thumbs up.  Sometimes, I'll even say "OK!"

ROCK: *turns to Terry*  (In JapaneseI'm going to kill you in this tournament, Terry Bogard.)

TERRY: *gives thumbs up*  OK!

ANDY: (o_o)  Do you have any idea what he just said?

TERRY: Nope…I'm assuming it was something nice, though.

ANDY: '-_-

RYO: *pokes his head into the locker room*  Psst…Terry…

TERRY: Yea, Ryo?

RYO: Is Geese here?

TERRY: *shaking fist*  GEEEEEESE?

RYO: Yea, Geese?

TERRY: No, I haven't seen *shaking fist*  GEEEEEESE  *stops shaking fist* all day today.

RYO: Alright, whew.  *walks into the locker room*

TERRY: What happened last Friday, man?  Todo told me that you were in quite a pinch.

RYO: Well, I was…you see—

INTERCOM: Terry Bogard, please report to the battle arena.

TERRY: Sorry.  I gotta go man…finish your story later, ok?

RYO: Alright.

TERRY: Later.  *leaves with Andy and Rock*

RYO: Hey, Sagat!

SAGAT: *exercising*  Oh hey, little buddy.  What's going on?

RYO: Not much.  Just chillin'.

SAGAT: That's good.  By the way, what happened with Geese last week?

RYO: Glad you asked…you see, I—

SAGAT: *hears his watch alarm go off*  Oops.  Sorry Ryo, but it's time for my vengeance management class.

RYO: How's it going for you?

SAGAT: Pretty good…I haven't killed a Ryu look-a-like in over 2 weeks.

RYO: Glad to hear it.

SAGAT: See ya.  *leaves*

IScene shifts to the announcer's booth in the battle arena/I

SECURITY GUARD: Alright buddy, this is the booth where you'll be doing your commentary.  If you need anything, just give me a holler, ok?

ANNOUNCER: …

SECURITY GUARD: *leaves*

ANNOUNCER: *sits down*  …alright ladies and gentleman!  This match up is about to begin!  But before we start, let's have a word from one of our sponsors.  Here comes a word from one of our sponsors.  I'm waiting.  C'mon, where's the commercial?  I thought there was supposed to be a commercial.  Oh wait, they're going to play the commercial as soon as I stop talking.  Okay, I guess that means I have to stop talking now.  I'm going to stop talking—*microphone gets cut off*

CROWD: *looks up at the monitor in the arena*

ICommercial begins/I

BILLY KANE: Hey guys, how's it going?

EIJI: Pretty good.

BILLY KANE: How about you, Iori?

IORI: …

EIJI: Iori?

IORI: …ROOOOARRRR!  *starts mauling Billy and Eiji*

RUGAL: *steps in front of the camera while the scene continues*  Have you ever had this happen to you, before?  Well, you're not alone then.  Lots of fighters have been ripped to shreds by maniacs like these.  *steps aside and looks at the scene behind him*  But that doesn't mean that there's nothing you can do about it.

BILLY KANE: *gets his arm ripped off*  What do you mean, Mr. Rugal?

EIJI: Yea, what can we do?  We need Iori on our team for—*head gets lobbed off*

RUGAL: Glad you asked, boys.  Just bring these psychos down to Rugal's Clinic For Psychopaths!  *background shifts to the inside of Rugal's clinic*  Here at Rugal's Clinic For Psychopaths, we have all the necessary equipment to turn those demented freaks into decent members of society!

ORDERLY 1: Come on, you!  *shocks Iori with a tazer*

ORDERLY 2: Yea!  *pokes Iori with a cattle prod*

IORI: ROARRRR!!!  *gets dragged into a dark room*

RUGAL: Just give us an hour with your maniac…

IORI: *screams like a girl from within the dark room*

RUGAL: …and we'll have them up to speed in no time flat.

IORI: *walks out looking distinguished*  I can't thank you enough, Mr. Rugal.  *leaves*

RUGAL: Our procedure, however, isn't guaranteed to keep the person sane forever, so when they flip out, just bring them back!  In fact, you can become a member of this fine establishment.  Members get 25% off their visits!

BISON: Before I discovered this clinic, I was a crazy, sadistic maniac bent on world domination.  Now, I'm just a crazy, sadistic maniac…WHO CAN CONTROL HIMSELF…bent on world domination!  Thank you Rugal for helping me.

RUGAL: ….right.  Our success rate here is 95%  I bet you're wondering what we do with the other 5% of our patients who can't be treated, right?  Well, we simply beat them to death with a giant mallet!

AMINGO: For the last time, I'M NOT CRAZY!!!

ORDERLY 1: Oh yea?  Then why do you keep saying you're a cactus?

AMINGO: THAT'S CUZ I AM A CACTUS!!

ORDERLY 2: Sure thing…now get over here so we can smash you with this mallet.

AMINGO: YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!  *runs off*

RUGAL: So come on down to Rugal's Clinic For Psychopaths.  Oh, and one more thing.  I'm not just the owner…*turns into Omega Rugal*…I'M ALSO A MEMBER!  ROARRR!!!  *begins struggling as he's dragged away by the orderlies*

IBack in the men's locker room/I

KEN: Damnit, he didn't fall for it, Ryu.

RYU: He didn't?

KEN: No…he saw right through my disguise.  I thought I made a pretty good looking Maki…

RYU: There, there Ken…you do make a pretty good Maki…*smiles*

KEN: Thanks Ryu.

RYO: *walks up to Ryu and Ken*  Hey guys.

KEN: Hey Ryu-bum.

RYO: How are…HEY!  My name's Ryo!

KEN: Sure thing, Ryu-bum.  *snickers*

RYO: At least this bum still has his package intact.  *grabs his crotch*

RYU: That was below the belt, man!

RYO: I know…that was the point.

RYU: Oh…

KEN: Anyways, what brings you here RYO?

RYO: Well, everyone's busy and I need to tell my story to someone.

RYU: You mean about you and Geese?

RYO: Yea.

KEN: Gee, no one really knows what happened, right?

RYO: Right.  Well, you see, Geese had me by the neck, right?  And he—

KEN: *stands up*  Sorry, gotta go.

RYO: Why?

KEN: I have business to attend to.  If you'll excuse me…*leaves*

RYO: Okay, I'll tell you then, Ryu.  You see, he—

RYU: *stands up*  Sorry, I gotta go too.

RYO: You got business too?!

RYU: Well, no…it's just that I gotta…you know…keep this gag running.

RYO: Oh…

RYU: See ya…*leaves*

RYO: DAMNIT!  Will anyone listen to my story?!

IScene shifts to the battle arena/I

ANNOUNCER: Alright folks, it's time for our first match!  This will be between Terry Bogard and Ryuji Yamazaki!  Fighters, please go to your teleporters.  You know, those things that are glowing blue over there.  Yea, those.  Just step on them.  Yea, they're safe.  Just—*microphone gets unplugged*

TERRY: Teleporters?  Wow, Robert and Ken went all out for this one.  I thought we'd fight here in the arena.

ANDY: We're with you Terry…let's go.

ROCK: (In JapaneseYea dumbass, get moving.)

ANDY: (o_o)

TERRY: *steps on the teleporter*  Whoa, we're in London!

ANDY: And we're out in the middle of the street.  LOOK OUT!  *jumps to the side*

ROCK: *jumps to the side*

TERRY: Watch out for what?  *turns around and sees a double-decker bus coming at him*  AHHH!  POWA GEYSA!  *blows the bus away*  Whew…OK!  *throws his hat*

ANNOUNCER: This is gonna be a match to remember…FIGHT!  And I did mean that.  This IS going to be one hell of a match.  Terry versus Yamazaki.  What a dynamic battle between—*microphone mysteriously goes dead*

TERRY: Huh?

YAMAZAKI: *leaps at Terry*  GYAAA!!!!!

TERRY: TIME OUT!

YAMAZAKI: *stops*  Time out?

TERRY: *runs to his hat*  I need my hat, Yamazaki.  *picks hat up and puts it on his head*  Okay, time in!

YAMAZAKI: Grrrr!  *charges Terry*

TERRY: POWA WAVE!  *throws projectile at Yamazaki*

YAMAZAKI: *gets hit*  Ah!

ANDY: *from the café across the street*  Go Terry!  *sips his tea*

TERRY: BURN KNACKU!  *flies at Yamazaki*

YAMAZAKI: Hehehe…blah!  *starts wiggling his tongue at Terry*

TERRY: Oh no!!  *hits Yamazaki*

YAMAZAKI: *counters*  Hya!  *knocks Terry into the air*

TERRY: Ah!

YAMAZAKI: TAKE THIS!  *does his Guillotine super, and drags Terry along the road*

TERRY: Ow!  Ooh!  Ah!  Eep!

YAMAZAKI: *continues holding Terry's head on the road*  And now, I'll keep you here till the next bus comes around.  Hahahaha!

ANDY: TERRY!!!!!!

TERRY: *looks in Andy's direction*

ANDY: Take this!  *throws a taco at Terry*

TERRY: *catches the taco*  Huh?

ANDY: Use the taco, Terry!  Use the taco!

TERRY: Aha!  *turns back to Yamazaki*  Grrr….*begins struggling*

YAMAZAKI: What're you doing?!

TERRY: ……RISING TACO!  *smashes the Taco in Yamazaki's face*

YAMAZAKI: ARRRGGGHHH!!!  *clutches his eyes*  The Fire Sauce…it burns…IT BURNS!

TERRY: *begins to stand up*

YAMAZAKI: *wipes his eyes*  THAT'S IT BOGARD…YOU ASKED FOR IT!

TERRY: Ahem.  *points behind Yamazaki*

YAMAZAKI: Huh?  *turns around and sees the bus coming at him*  AHHHH!!!  *gets hit and begins getting dragged under the bus*

ANDY: *walks up to Terry*  Woo-hoo Terry!  You're the man!

ROCK: *walks up to Terry*  (In JapaneseLucky bastard…)

ANDY: (In JapaneseShut up and be nice for a change!)

ROCK: (In JapaneseAlright…good work, Terry…for an old timer…)

ANDY: '-_-

TERRY: Yea, I guess that was good.  Thanks for the help, Andy…I appreciate it.

ANDY: Not a problem.

TERRY: How do we get back to the arena, though?

ANDY: I think we gotta take the bus to the bus station.

TERRY: Alright, I see another one coming right now.

ANDY: Hey Terry…I just thought of something…

TERRY: What?

ANDY: Wasn't the announcer supposed to say "KO" or something like that?

TERRY: I think so…bah, who cares.  *looks at the approaching bus*  Hey, how come this bus looks familiar?

ANDY: Oh no…

TERRY: What?

ANDY: Sorry, we gotta step out of this Terry.  *starts walking away*

TERRY: Step out of what?  *looks at a shadowy figure latched on to the back of the bus*  Oh no…

YAMAZAKI: *leaps off the bus*  STILL ALIVE!!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!

TERRY: *gets into his battle stance*

YAMAZAKI: *lands*  I'LL KILL YOU!!!  *charges Terry*  GYAAAA!!!!

TERRY: *steadies himself*

YAMAZAKI: GYAAAAAAAA—*gets hit by another bus*

TERRY: (o_o)

ANNOUNCER: K.OOOOO.!!!!!!!

YAMAZAKI: I'll get you Bogard!!!  And your little brother too!!  *gets dragged off into the sunset*

TERRY: …

ANDY: …

ROCK: …

TERRY: That was weird…

bThe first match has been fought, and what a match it was.  Terry defeated Yamazaki in an amazing fight!  What will be the next bout?  Will Ken ever get changed back?  Will Yamazaki stop being hit by buses?  And when will Ryo get to tell his story?  Stay tuned to find out!/b


	8. THE WEIRDNESS NEVER ENDS

CHAPTER 8: THE WEIRDNESS NEVER ENDS Dante Conforti Normal Dante Conforti 4 11 2001-10-30T05:25:00Z 2001-11-06T19:38:00Z 3 1075 6132 Self 51 12 7530 9.2720 

CHAPTER 8: THE WEIRDNESS NEVER ENDS

bIt's still the first day of the actual Capcom vs SNK 2 tourney, and we already have a fighter that's moved up in the ranks.  Terry Bogard defeated Ryuji Yamazaki last chapter with some pretty clever moves.  We also got a chance to hear the new announcer…*shudders*…who kept having his microphone mysteriously unplugged.  And let's not forget Ryo, who's been having a hard time telling his story about Geese to the other fighters.  Anyways, let's get on with Chapter 8!

In the men's locker room/b

KIM: *stretching out*

RYO: *walks up to Kim*  Hey Kim, how's it going?

KIM: Pretty good.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

RYO: That's cool.  How about you Chang?

CHANG: I'm good!  OOOOOH!  *does the Truffle Shuffle*

RYO: Uh yea…so what are you guys doing?

KIM: We're just getting stretched out.  We're gonna have a match later.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

RYO: Ah, I see.  *hears a loud ping next to him*

KIM: Chang, stop flinging boogers at Ryo.

CHANG: Sorry.

RYO: (o_o)

KIM: *walks over to a sink to wash his face*

RYO: *walks over to another sink to wash his face*

KIM: *drying his face off*  I heard you have a match later.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

RYO: Uh yea, I'm hoping that I'll win it.  Hey Kim, can I ask you something?

KIM: Sure.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

RYO: …how come you smile like that all the time?

KIM: It's a habit.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

RYO: Oh okay…well, I hope you do good in your match later.

KIM: Yeah, me too.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

RYO: Good luck.  *slaps Kim's back hard*

KIM: *his teeth fly out of his mouth*

RYO: *sees Kim's open mouth with only 3 yellow and decaying teeth*  Eeep!

KIM: *picks up his dentures*  Damnit!  I didn't put enough Poligrip in!  *puts his dentures back in*

RYO: (o_o)

KIM: Not a word to anyone…or else you die!  *jiggling his teeth around*

RYO: …ok.

KIM: Good.

RYO: …but…how…

KIM: Gingivitis.

RYO: …oh.

KIM: Remember…not a word to ANYONE…*walks away*

RYO: *pictures Kim's "real" teeth again*  Ugh…I think I'm gonna be sick…*runs toward the nearest open bathroom stall*

TODO: *steps in front of Ryo, blocking the stall*

RYO: Todo…move…NOW!  I need…the stall…

TODO: ASK FOR IT WITH YOUR POWER!

RYO: *throws up on Todo*

TODO: …

RYO: …

TODO: …

RYO: …

TODO: …YOU BASTARD!  *walks away yelling obscenities*

RYO: I told him to move, but he didn't believe me…WHY DIDN'T HE BELIEVE ME?!

IScene shifts to a McDonalds inside the building/I

TERRY: Wow, all that fighting sure makes me hungry.

ANDY: Really…I wouldn't know… *pouts*

TERRY: Awww…c'mon little bro, don't be like that.  I'm sure you'll be in the next tournament.

ANDY: I hope so.  *looks at the menu*  Gee, they don't have anything healthy here, do they?

TERRY: It's McDonalds…what do you think?

ROCK: (In JapaneseYea, dumbass…)

ANDY: *shoots a dirty look at Rock*

TERRY: Hey Balrog, I didn't know you worked here.

BALROG: This is a part-time job for me.

TERRY: Cool…give me a Big Mac meal.

BALROG: $10.00 please.

TERRY: WHAT?!  *gives a $20 bill to Balrog*  Man, I'm gonna bring my own food here from now on.

BALROG: I GOT PAID!  *puts the money in the drawer and gives back the change*

ANDY: Ok…umm…give me the healthiest meal you got.

BALROG: Double Quarter Pounder w/Cheese Meal…that'll be $15.00

ANDY: That's expensive…*hands Balrog exact change*

BALROG: I GOT PAID!  *puts the money in the drawer*

ROCK: (In JapaneseThis guy's a fucking retard.)  Big…Mac…Meal.

BALROG: $10.00.

ROCK: (In JapaneseThat's crazy…I should kick his ass for making me pay this much.)  *hands Balrog exact change*

BALROG: I GOT PAID!  *puts the money in the drawer*  (In JapaneseWatch who you call a "retard" kid…next time I'll kick your ass.)

ROCK: (o_o)

BALROG: (In JapaneseBet you didn't see that one coming.)  *gives all three of them their orders*

TERRY: *sits down at a table*  Mmmm…this looks good.

ANDY: Umm, excuse me…are you sure this is the healthiest thing you got?

BALROG: Sure…why do you ask?

ANDY: Well…my food is floating in grease…isn't that bad?

BALROG: Nope.

ANDY: …ok.  *leaves to sit down*

ROCK: *takes his food and quickly goes to sit down*

MANAGER: Here's your paycheck Balrog.  *gives Balrog his paycheck*

BALROG: I GOT PAID!!!  *rips off his shirt*

MANAGER: …I wish you would stop doing that.

IScene moves to the announcer's booth in the battle arena/I

ANNOUNCER: Our next match is coming up folks!  Until then, we'd like to show a word from one of our sponsors.  Here comes the commercial.  Wait, I have to shut up first don't I?  Maybe I should stop talking now.  Why do I keep talking like this?  Maybe it's because—*microphone cuts off*

CROWD: *looks up at the monitor in the arena*

ICommercial Begins/I

GEESE: *storms into his office*  Grrr….

BILLY: Hey boss, you have another bad day today?

GEESE: *looks at Billy*  What do YOU think?

BILLY: Well sir, you don't pay me to think.

GEESE: …true…what happened to your arm?

BILLY: Mr. Yagami ripped it off, sir.

GEESE: Oh, so you let Yagami rip your arm off, but you won't let me, your own boss, do it?

BILLY: Well sir, I—

GEESE: *rips Billy's other arm off*

BILLY: Very good, sir.

GEESE: Hmmm…I'm still not satisfied…maybe I should rip your head off…

BILLY: Um, sir…I have something for you.

GEESE: Oh?  What is it?

BILLY: *pulls out a big box*  It's the Beat-a-Bao Doll!

GEESE: Beat-a-Bao?

ANNOUNCER: That's right, Geese Howard.

GEESE: Who said that?

ANNOUNCER: It's the brand new Beat-a-Bao Doll!

GEESE: Who's talking?

ANNOUNCER: Beat-a-Bao is a life-size beat-em-up doll.  It comes with realistic parts, including breakable bones and bruisable skin!

GEESE: Really?  *opens the box up*

ANNOUNCER: And it includes a realistic voice simulator, which responds to your vicious attacks!  Beat-a-Bao is a wonderful contraption for relieving stress or just for having fun!  Go ahead, give it a try!

GEESE: *takes the Beat-a-Bao out of the box*  Wow…cool!

BAO: Wait, I'm not really a doll!

GEESE: And it's so realistic too!  *grabs Bao's arm*

BAO: No, they didn't have a doll ready for the commercial!  It's me, the real Bao!

GEESE: Oh my, it even begs and pleads realistically!  This'll save me lots of money on disposable henchman!

BAO: You don't understand!  Please…don't do it!  Noooo!!!!  *screen goes black*

ANNOUNCER: *Beat a Bao logo comes up*  Beat-a-Bao…the future in stress relievers!  Beat-a-Bao does not actually come with realistic begging and pleading.  Batteries sold separately.

BAO: *while screen is still black*  NO!  WAIT!  NOOOOO!!!!

IScene shifts to match registration desk/I

KIM: Hi, I'm here to report for my match.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

LADY: Name?

KIM: Kim Kaphwan.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

LADY: And you are?

CHANG: CHANG!  OOOOH!  *does the Truffle Shuffle* 

LADY: Alright you can…hey, who's that?  *points to Choi who's standing behind Chang*

CHANG: Huh?

LADY: What's his name?

CHANG: Choi!

LADY: *checks list*  He's not on here…sorry, he's gonna have to leave.

CHOI: *whimpers*

KIM: Wait…he's Chang's pet monkey!

LADY: Pet monkey?

KIM: Hey, Nakoruru has a pet bird.

LADY: …true.  Already, go on through.

KIM: Thanks!  *does his shiny teeth smile*

bWhat a…weird chapter, folks.  Kim's secret has been revealed, Balrog knows Japanese, and Choi is now Chang's pet monkey!  What's in store for this team?  Will anyone else find out Kim's secret?  Stay tuned for Chapter 9, when Kim and Chang square off against E. Honda, Dhalsim, and Blanka./b


	9. THE FIGHTING CONTINUES

bWelcome back readers Dante Conforti Normal Dante Conforti 10 12 2001-11-06T19:28:00Z 2001-11-06T19:40:00Z 4 1518 8654 Self 72 17 10627 9.2720 

CHAPTER 9: THE FIGHTING CONTINUES

bWelcome back readers!  Last chapter, we saw Ryo discover Kim's little "secret", as well as Terry, Andy and Rock treating themselves to a McDonalds!  We also saw a commercial for "Beat-a-Bao" and lastly, we witnessed Kim and Chang checking in for their first match up!  Let's join our Capcom and SNK crew for Chapter 9 of our story!

In the men's locker room/b

KIM: Alright guys, we're all signed up for our match.  You ready?  *does his shiny teeth smile*

CHANG: Oooooh yea!  *doing the Truffle Shuffle*

CHOI: *makes Gremlin sounds*

KIM: Uh, ok.

RYO: *walks up to Kim*  You guys all set?

KIM: Sure am.  Wish me luck.  *does his shiny teeth smile*

RYO: Good luck.

???: You're gonna need it.

KIM: Who said that?

???: It is I!

KIM: Oh, it's just you Jhun.  What're you doing here?  *does his shiny teeth smile*

JHUN: I decided to sit this tournament out!

KIM: Why's that?  *does his shiny teeth smile*

JHUN: Because I found three excellent fighters that I will take to the top!

RYO: Who?

JHUN: Blanka, Dhalsim, and E. Honda!

KIM: That means…I'll be fighting you guys.

JHUN: That's right.

RYO: Wait a minute…aren't those the singing fighters?

JHUN: *clasps his hand on Ryo's mouth*  Don't mention ANYTHING involving singing!  They may be strong, but I CAN'T STAND THEIR SINGING!

E.HONDA: What was that boss?

JHUN: Nothing Honda!

BLANKA: I think someone mentioned singing…

DHALSIM: That reminds me of a song…

JHUN: NO!  NO SINGING!  LET'S GET OUT OF HERE NOW!  *leaves with Honda, Dhalsim, and Blanka.

RYO: I feel sorry for him.

KIM: Yea, I may have two stupid morons to train, but at least they're not SINGING morons!  *does his shiny teeth smile*

CHANG: *picking his nose*  Huh?

CHOI: *spazzing out*

RYO: Yea, I see what you mean.  Oh by the way, you wanna hear what happened between me and Geese?

KIM: Sorry bro, gotta go.  *does his shiny teeth smile, then leaves with Chang and Choi*

RYO: DAMN!  *looks around*  Do YOU want to hear my story?

YAMAZAKI: *tending to his wounds*  No.

RYO: Awww, c'mon!

YAMAZAKI: No!

RYO: Pretty please?

YAMAZAKI: *does his win pose where he grabs the opponent by the head*

RYO: …I'll shut up now.

YAMAZAKI: Thanks.

IIn the women's locker room/I

MAKI: *warming up*

YURI: *walks up to Maki*  I can't wait to kick your butt today!

MAKI: Huh?

YURI: That's right.  Me and Sakura versus you, Mai, and King later today.  It's already been announced.

MAKI: Okay, cool.

YURI: And I'll also reveal your secret to the world!

MAKI: *whispering*  I'd like to see you try, bitch.

YURI: Grrr…

MAKI: Hahahaha!  *walks away*

YURI: Just you wait and see, Maki!

TAKUMA: *bursts in*  DAUGHTER!!!!

YURI: *turns around, scared*  WHAT?!  I…didn't say anything…bad…

TAKUMA: I KNOW!  HAVE YOU SEEN RYO?

YURI: No.

TAKUMA: THANK YOU!  *runs off*

SAKURA: *walks up to Yuri*  Gee, what's going on with your dad?

YURI: Eh, he's just getting old and senile, that's all.

TAKUMA: *bursts in*  DAUGHTER!!!!

YURI: Damnit!  Noooo! *gets dragged away*

TAKUMA: I WILL TEACH YOU TO RESPECT YOUR ELDERS!  *runs off dragging Yuri with him*

IIn the announcer's booth/I

ANNOUNCER: Just a quick word from one of our sponsors folks, and then we'll be starting the next match up.  Kim and Chang w/Choi versus E. Honda, Dhalsim, and Blanka with Jhun in their corner!  Here comes the commercial folks—

MAN IN CROWD: Wow, he shut up for once.

CROWD: *looks up at the monitor in the arena*

???: Muhahaha…*tying up the announcer*

ICommercial Begins/I

DANNY: Mom, me and Steve are bored.

MOM: Danny, you guys are 17 years old.  Shouldn't you be dating girls by now?

DANNY: …

STEVE: …

ANNOUNCER: Hey there!  Are you guys bored?

DANNY: We sure are mister.

ANNOUNCER: Do you like Capcom and SNK?

STEVE: YOU BET!

ANNOUNCER: Well then, why not try out the brand new Capcom vs SNK 2 board game!

DANNY: Wow!

STEVE: Totally awesome!

ANNOUNCER: That's right folks!  It's the official Capcom vs SNK 2 board game!  You can now have all the fun of the video game right here in this board game!

DANNY: How does it work mister?

ANNOUNCER: It's simple, Danny.  Make a team of three fighters from those 48 figurines over there, and try to make it to Osaka to become the champion!

STEVE: *rolls the dice, and moves five spaces*  Hmm…"Akuma says 'Me Suit'.   Move back 5 spaces."  Aww man!

DANNY: *rolls the dice and moves twelve spaces*  Uh, "Mai and Blue Mary make you their love slave.  You cannot move for another 10 turns."  Aww, c'mon!

ANNOUNCER: And when you finally get to the end, see if you can defeat God Rugal or Shin Gouki to win the game!

STEVE: Alright, all I need is to roll a 13 to beat them.  *rolls the dice and gets 12*  Shit!  That means I have to start back at the beginning.

DANNY: Wait a minute…we only have two dice…how can we beat them?

ANNOUNCER: YOU CAN'T!  I FOOL YOU AGAIN!

DANNY: Oh…

ANNOUNCER: The Capcom vs SNK 2 official Board Game.  Go out and buy one now…we command you to!  *starts making out with the mom*

DANNY: MOM!

IBack in the arena/I

KIM: You guys ready?  *does his shiny teeth smile*

CHANG: Oooh yea!  *does the Truffle Shuffle*

CHOI: *slamming his head against the ground*

KIM: …ALRIGHT!  *does his shiny teeth smile*

JHUN: Alright, are YOU guys ready?

E.HONDA: Sure am, boss!

DHALSIM: Yes sir.

BLANKA: Totally.

JHUN: Remember, you guys were meant to be fighters!

E.HONDA: We were meant to be fighters, hmm?

JHUN: Yes.

BLANKA: The fans, the fighters, the adrenaline rush…I feel a song coming on…

DHALSIM: That reminds me of a song…

ALL 3: *starts dancing as the music kicks in*

E.HONDA: We're a band of vicious fighters!

BLANKA: Just take a look at me!

DHALSIM: When you hear a gentle singing—

E.HONDA: You'll be sure to turn and flee!

JHUN: Oh this is just ridiculous.  C'mon men, we've got to defeat those saps!

DHALSIM: Those guys'll be done for when they fall into our traps!  We're a club of frightful rovers!

E.HONDA: We can sing in every clef!

BLANKA: We can even hit the high note!

E.HONDA: It's just too bad we're tone deaf!

ALL 3: A fighter I was meant to be!  Be a bum and roam the street!

JHUN: All right guys, let's get to work!

E.HONDA: Our match is a thing we love, a thing we'd never shirk!  We'll fight you in Ken's harbor!

DHALSIM: Or battle you on land!

BLANKA: When you meet singing fighters—

JHUN: They'll be more than you can stand!

DHALSIM: Oh, that was a good one!

JHUN: No, it wasn't…no time for song, we've got to move!

DHALSIM: The battle will be long, but our courage we will prove!  We're a pack of nasty dogs!

E.HONDA: Have we pity?  Not a dram!

BLANKA: We all eat roasted garlic—

E.HONDA: Then sing from the diaphragm!

ALL 3: A fighter I was meant to be!  Be a bum and roam the street!

JHUN: Less singing, less wailing!

BLANKA: When we defeat our foes, their match they will be bailing!

DHALSIM: If you try to fight us—

E.HONDA: You will get a nasty whackin'!

BLANKA: If ye disrespect our singin'—

DHALSIM: WE WILL FEED YOU TO A CRACKIN'!

ALL 3: A fighter I was meant to be!  Be a bum and roam the street!

JHUN: Stop.  Stop!  STOP!

DHALSIM: Our pride is what we'll polish, and with them, the deck we'll mop!

JHUN: You say you're nasty fighters!  Big scheming, bad bushwackers!  From what I've seen, I tell you, you're not fighters, you're just slackers!

ALL 3: A fighter I was meant to be!  Be a bum and roam the street!

JHUN: My favorite kind of fruit would definitely be an orange…

E.HONDA: And…umm…

DHALSIM: Well…

BLANKA: Uh…

DHALSIM: …door hinge?

BLANKA: No, no…

DHALSIM: Guess the song's over, huh?

E.HONDA: Guess so.

BLANKA: Alright, back to the battle.

JHUN: Well gee, I feel a little guilty now…

MAN IN CROWD: Lucas Arts is gonna get ye for this!

JHUN: (o_o)

KIM: That was…strange.

CHOI: *starts stabbing Chang in the ass with his claws*

CHANG: Ooooh!  *grabs his ass*

KIM: Let's get on those teleporters, guys.  *gets teleported to the battle arena*

IThe fighters are teleported to the Glacier stage with the big boat/I

ANNOUNCER: Round 1…FIGHT!  Muhahaha!

JHUN: That voice sounds familiar…whatever.  Dhalsim, go teach him a lesson.

KIM: Go get 'im Chang!  *does his shiny teeth smile*

DHALSIM: Yoga!  *grabs Chang and starts doing the Yoga Noogie*  Yoga!  Yoga!  Yoga!

CHANG: *yawns*

DHALSIM: Yoga!  Yoga!  Yo—

CHANG: *grabs Dhalsim, and does his Dai Hakai Nage*  Oooh!

DHALSIM: *getting slammed around like a Loony Toons character*

CHANG: Ooooh!  *drops Dhalsim*

DHALSIM: *dizzy*

ANNOUNCER: FINISH HIM!  Muhahaha!

CHANG: Huh?  *looks at Kim*

KIM: You heard the man.  Do it.

CHANG: *picks up Dhalsim and starts twisting him into a pretzel*

DHALSIM: This…no…good…

CHANG: *starts knawing on Dhalsim's head*

DHALSIM: AHHHHH!!!!

CHANG: *eats Dhalsim whole*

ANNOUNCER: Chang Wins!  Muhahaha!  Fatality!  Muhahaha!

JHUN: DAMN!  We've already lost one of our fighters!

BLANKA: Dhalsim, NOOOO!!!  *jumps into the fight and starts singing*  I'll rip you to pieces!  I'll rip you to pieces!  I'LL RIP YOU TO PIECES…which nobody can deny!

ANNOUNCER: Round 2…FIGHT!  Muhahaha!

BLANKA: ROARRRR!!!!  *leaps at Chang*

CHANG: *starts spinning his ball and chain*

BLANKA: ROARRR—*gets impaled in the head by one of the string of flags that shoots from the ship*

JHUN: (o_o)

ANNOUNCER: Chang Wins!  Muhahaha!  Flawless Victory!  Muhahaha!

JHUN: You FUCKING ship!  Nobody likes you!

SHIP: *gets depressed and sails away*

JHUN: Alright Honda, it's up to you now!

E.HONDA: *singing*  I will avenge the deaths of my friends!  Prepare to taste defeat!  I, Honda, will…DESTROY…YOU!

CHANG: Oooh!  *does the Truffle Shuffle*

ANNOUNCER: Round 3…FIGHT!  Muhahaha!

E.HONDA: Hya Hya Hya!  *starts doing his hundred-hand slap*

CHANG: *getting hit*  Ooooh!

E.HONDA: Gya!  *does his Ooichou Nage and lands on top of Chang*

CHANG: Ugh…

E.HONDA: And now…for the finish…Oy oy!  *does his flying headbutt*

CHANG: *ducks*

E.HONDA: *flies off the glacier and lands in the water*

ANNOUNCER: Chang Wins!  Muhahaha!  Fatality!  Muhahaha!

JHUN: DAMNIT!

KIM: Good job, Chang!  *does his shiny teeth smile*

ANNOUNCER: Muhahaha!  Hey, what're you guys doing here?  Muhahaha!  C'mon, I want to be the announcer!  Muhahaha!  You are weak pathetic fools!  Muhahaha!  Let go of me!  Muhahaha!  Noooo!  Muhahaha!

bWhat an amazing battle!  Kim and Chang managed to defeat Blanka, E. Honda, and Dhalsim.  What will happen to those fighters?  And what about the announcer?  And what of the match that will take place between Yuri and Sakura versus Maki, Mai, and King?  Stay tuned for part 10, entitled "Battle Between The Babes!"

NOTE: This is not part of the story here.  I just wanted to give credit where credit is due.  The song that E. Honda, Blanka, and Dhalsim sing was taken from the computer game "The Curse of Monkey Island."  If you get a chance, check it out.  It's an AWESOME game.  Major thanks to Lucas Arts since they made that song.  Remember, I just wanted you all to know that I didn't make up that song, I just changed it a little bit.  Peace out.


	10. BATTLE BETWEEN THE BABES

CHAPTER 10: BATTLE BETWEEN THE BABES

bHello folks, and welcome back to the story!  Last chapter, we saw Chang and Kim defeat Jhun's team of Dhalsim, Blanka, and E. Honda.  Not only that, but we were also informed of our next match up, which will be taking place in this chapter.  Yuri and Sakura vs Maki, Mai, and King.  And now, let's get on with Chapter 10, entitled "Battle Between The Babes!"

In the women's locker room/b

SAKURA: *kicking air*  Hya!  Hoo!  Ha!

YURI: *walks in wearing a shirt that says "I Respect Old, Wrinkly People"*

SAKURA: Ya!  *kicks shoe off*

YURI: *gets hit in the face by Sakura's shoe*  '-_-

SAKURA: Eep!

YURI: *walks up to Sakura*  Is this yours?

SAKURA: Yea, actually it is—

YURI: *stuffs the shoe into Sakura's mouth*

SAKURA: (o_o)

YURI: At least I feel a little better.  *getting changed into her uniform*  Are you ready for the match?

SAKURA: *putting shoe back on*  Yea, I guess so.

YURI: Alright, good.  I wanna win this and move on.

SAKURA: Yup, me too!

YURI: We also have to devise a way to reveal Maki's secret to the audience…hmmm…

SAKURA: I got an idea!

YURI: If it involves bringing a bucket of hot water to the fight, it's not gonna work.

SAKURA: Damn!

YURI: …

SAKURA: …

YURI: …

SAKURA: …I know!

YURI: I told you—

SAKURA: No, no!  It's even better than that.  Here, this is what we could do.  *whisper whisper*

YURI: …

SAKURA: *whisper whisper*

YURI: …you know, that may work.  Good job, Sakura.

SAKURA: *whisper whisper*

YURI: You can stop whispering now.

SAKURA: *whisper whis—

YURI: STOP IT!

SAKURA: Sorry.

IIn the men's locker room/I

BENIMARU: *sitting on a bench, looking depressed* …

KYO: *walks up to Benimaru*  Hey Beni.

BENIMARU: …hi Kyo…

KYO: You pumped for our match later?

BENIMARU: …eh…

KYO: Is something wrong?

BENIMARU: …no one understands me…

KYO: Benimaru, don't you DARE turn into a Kyosuke on me!  I don't want another depressed teenager walking around here!

KYOSUKE: *walking by*  I'm…all alone.  Nobody likes me.  I'm a loser.  *sigh*

KYO: Shut up!  No one here feels sorry for you!

KYOSUKE: …damn!  *walks away*

KYO: …uh huh.  Anyways, why do you say that?

BENIMARU: …everyone thinks I'm…you know…

KYO: Fruity?

BENIMARU: …yea.

KYO: Aren't you?

BENIMARU: *shoots Kyo a dirty look*

KYO: Sorry!  I didn't know, man.

BENIMARU: …I…I don't know WHAT I am really…

KYO: What do you mean?

BENIMARU: I want love…but…just a different kind…

KYO: …I'm not following you, buddy.

BENIMARU: …I'll explain it…in song.  *music starts*

JHUN: *running by*  NOOOOO!!!!  NOT ANOTHER SONG!!!!  *runs out of the locker room*

BENIMARU: I want love…but it's impossible.  A man like me…so irresponsible.

KYO: ?

BENIMARU: A man like me is dead in places…other men…feel lib-er-ated.  *looks down at his own crotch*

KYO: ??

BENIMARU: I can't love…shot full of holes…

YAMAZAKI: *pumps Benimaru full of lead*  WAHAHAHAHA!  *does his insane laugh pose*

BENIMARU: Don't feel nothing…

YAMAZAKI: ARGH!  *does his defeated pose where his ass is in the air*

BENIMARU: I just feel cold.  *turns around and looks at Iceman*

ICEMAN: Oops…sorry.  *walks away*

BENIMARU: Don't feel nothing…just old scars…toughening up…

SAGAT: You said it, brotha!

BENIMARU: …around my heart.

SAGAT: Oh…

BENIMARU: But I want love…just a different kind.  I want love, won't break me down, won't brick me up, won't fence me in…I want love that don't mean a thing.  That's the love I want…I want love…

KYO: ???

BENIMARU: So bring it on…I've been bruised.  *looks at his face in the mirror*  AH!  Don't give me love that's clean and smooth.  I'm ready for…the rougher stuff.  No sweet romance…I've had enough.

RAIDEN: *walks up to Benimaru and puts a hand on Beni's shoulder*

ZANGIEF: *walks up to Benimaru and puts a hand on Beni's other shoulder*

BENIMARU: *turns around*

RAIDEN: ^_^

ZANGIEF: ^_^

BENIMARU: (o_o)  *quickly walks away from Raiden and Zangief*

RAIDEN: …

ZANGIEF: …

RAIDEN: *turns to Zangief*  I'll dance on your brain!

ZANGIEF: *turns to Raiden*  You're dead meat!  *grabs Raiden and starts rolling around*

KYO: ????

BENIMARU: …so, do you understand, Kyo?

KYO: ?????

BENIMARU: Kyo?

KYO: …oh, I'm sorry.  Did you say something?  I spaced out there for a second.

BENIMARU: '-_- …Benimaru Punt!  *kicks Kyo in the face*

KYO: *falls over*

IIn Robert Garcia's office/I

ROBERT: Hello Yuri, my darling whom I've never had pre-marital relations with before.  What can I do for you?

YURI: Well, Sakura and I would like our match to be fought on that US stage.  You know, the one with the big guy drinking the beer like all Americans do?

ROBERT: Not all Americans drink beer ya know.

GUILE: *walking by*  Ret's go!  Rice Barrel!  *walks away*

ROBERT: Well…anyways, why do you want to fight there?

YURI: Oh…no reason.  *giggles to herself*

ROBERT: I guess that's alright.

YURI: Oh, and can you do one more favor for me?

ROBERT: Look Yuri, we can't do that now…your dad may be watching!

YURI: (o_o)  NO, NOT THAT!  I mean, can you…*whisper whisper*

ROBERT: Okay…I guess so.

YURI: Thank you!  ^_^  *leaves with Sakura*

IIn the announcers booth/I

ANNOUNCER: Well folks, I'm back!  It looks like that other crazy announcer guy is finally out of here.  Good thing too, he tied me up and beat me with a hammer.  Anyways, let's cut to a commercial break before our next match starts.  Here comes the commercial folks.  It's coming up right about…now.  Right about…now.  Right about—*gets hit in the back of the head with a hammer again*

CROWD: *looks up at the monitor in the arena*

ICommercial begins/I

ANNOUNCER: Are you ready for the biggest rap album of ALLLLLL time!  Well then, you might as well ignore this commercial.  Otherwise, get psyched for another rap album from the infamous rap group "Shoto-KAN!"  That's right my peoples!  With more shotos in this group than there are band players in Slipknot, Shoto-KAN drops their newest record this Tuesday entitled "Hadoulicious!" featuring "Hadoulicious"…

RYU: I don't think you're ready, whoa nelly!

KEN: I don't think you're ready, whoa nelly!

AKUMA: I don't think you're ready for this!

RYU: My moves are too Hadoulicious for ya babe!

ANNOUNCER: …"One Round Man"…

RYU: Fight me off!

KEN: Show me whatcha got!

RYU: Cuz I don't want no one round man!

ANNOUNCER: …and featuring Dan in "Can't Fight This!"

DAN: *dancing with Hammer pants on*  Can't fight this!  Can't fight this!  Can't fight this!  Can't fight this!  Can't fight this!  My, my, my, my Koryuken hits you so hard, makes you say—

RYU: Oh my lord!

DAN: Thank you, for blessing me, with a mind to rhyme and two hype feet!  It feels good, when you know you've won!  A super dope homeboy from the J-Town.  And I'm known, with might, this is a match, uh, you can't fight!  I told ya homeboy!

RYU: Can't fight this?

DAN: Yea, that's how we living and you know—

KEN: Can't fight this?

DAN: Look at my eyes, man!

AKUMA: Can't fight this?

DAN: Break it down!  *music breaks down as Dan does Hammer's side to side dancing*

SEAN AND SAKURA: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa!  Whoa!  Whoa-whoa!

ALLEN AND KAIRI: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa!  Whoa!  Whoa-whoa!

DAN: Stop!  Saikyo Time!  *starts kicking the crap out of everyone*

ANNOUNCER: "Hadoulicious" from Shoto-KAN!  Dropping in stores this Tuesday!  Peace out!

IOn the US rooftop stage/I

MAKI: Strange stage…

MAI: You can say that again.

KING: *hugging the big beer drinking guy*  I LOVE YOU!  Hiccup!  -_-

MAI: ???

YURI: *walks up*  Alright guys, prepare to be defeated!

MAI: Awww, that's so cute Yuri.  ^_^

YURI: '-_-

ANNOUNCER: Live and let die!  Fight!

MAI: King, why don't you go first?

KING: *snoring loudly*

ANNOUNCER: K. O. !!!!!

SAKURA: Wow, that's the quickest KO I've ever gotten.

MAI: Alright, I'll go next.  *slaps Maki's ass*  Wish me luck.  ~_^

MAKI: Good luck.

SAKURA: Ikuza!  *runs at Mai*

MAI: Kachou Sen!  *throws a fan at Sakura*

SAKURA: *gets hit*  Ah!  So, you wanna play that way huh?  Hadou Shou!  *does that crappy little fireball thing*

MAI: Hahahaha!

SAKURA: Awww, man!  That's the last time I have Dan show me some new moves.

MAI: Cho Hissatsu Shinobi Bachi!  *does her Deadly Ninja Bees super*

SAKURA: *gets KO'ed*

ANNOUNCER: K. O. !!!!!

YURI: Damn, it's up to me now.

MAI: C'mon Yuri, give me everything you got!

YURI: Hao Sho Kohoken!  *throws her super fireball at Mai*

MAI: *gets hit*  …owwee…

ANNOUNCER: K. O. !!!!!

MAKI: Alright Yuri, it's down to you and me now!

YURI: Bring it on!

MAKI: *runs up to Yuri*  Ajara Tengu!  *does her super throw move*

YURI: Ugh…*on one knee and panting*

MAKI: Hahahaha!  And now, for the finish!  *starts running at Yuri*

YURI: …NOW SAKURA!

MAKI: *while running*  Huh?

SAKURA: Shinkuu Hadouken!  *does her super fireball and hits the beer mug in the big guy's hand*

YURI: *watches as hot water lands on Maki*

MAKI: AHHHHH!!!!  *starts grabbing at her clothing and begins transforming into Guy* 

MAI: (o_o)

SAKURA (o_o)

GUY: Ugh…oh, my head.  *looks around*  EEP!  Everyone knows my secret now!

CROWD: *laughing hysterically*

GUY: You…win…

ANNOUNCER: FINEST K. O. !!!!!

GUY: Shut up!  *runs away*

YURI: *does her thumbs up winpose*

bMaki's secret has finally been revealed to the world!  Oh my!  What will happen to Guy now?  And what of Kyo and Benimaru's match coming up?  You'll just have to stay tuned and find out next chapter!  Muhahahaha!/b


	11. FIGHT-O-RAMA!

CHAPTER 11: FIGHT-O-RAMA!

bWelcome back to our story!  In the last chapter, we saw Benimaru sing a song about his feelings.  Not only that, but we also saw Yuri and Sakura beat King, Mai, and Maki, and in the process, reveal Maki's secret to the world.  With that taken care of, let's move on to chapter 11 of our story.

In the Shanghai arena with the rotating platform/b

KYO: You ready Beni?

BENIMARU: *grabs his crotch and lightning strikes*  Yea.

KYO: Eww, I really wish you wouldn't do that.

ANNOUNCER: Live and let die!  FIGHT!

KYO: You go first.

BENIMARU: Zaank you!  *steps forward*

EAGLE: *twirling his sticks*  Ready?

BENIMARU: Whenever you are.

EAGLE: OXFORD RED!  *hitting Benimaru with his sticks*

BENIMARU: Ack!  Take this!  ELECTRIGGER!  *grabs Eagle and shocks him*

EAGLE: AHHHH!!!  *falls to his knees*

BENIMARU: *poses*  Do you understand?

EAGLE: …

BENIMARU: Well?

EAGLE: …HYA!  *does his St. Andrew Green and pops Benimaru into the air*

BENIMARU: AGH!  Why you—

EAGLE: *jumping in*  GYA!

BENIMARU: INAZUMA KICK!  *flip kicks Eagle*

EAGLE: ARGGH!  *gets knocked back*

BENIMARU: HYAAA!  *charges Eagle*

EAGLE: HYAAA!  *charges Benimaru*

BENIMARU: *locks up with Eagle*

EAGLE: It…doesn't…look like either…of us will win!

BENIMARU: I guess…you've got…a point there.

EAGLE: How about…we go grab a drink?

BENIMARU: Sure!  *walks away from the ring with Eagle*

ANNOUNCER: DOUBLE K.O.!!!!

KYO: WHAT?!  YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME HERE TO FIGHT ALL BY MYSELF!

BENIMARU: *turns around*  Oh c'mon Mr. I'm-so-great-I-declared-myself-the-hero-of-SNK, you've been complaining for years that you could win the King of Fighters tournament ALL by yourself, so here's your chance.

KYO: I didn't mean it though!

BENIMARU: *leaves*

KYO: (o_o)  *slowly turns around*

GUILE: *rotating his arm*  RET'S BATTLE!

ANNOUNCER: This is gonna be a match to remember!  FIGHT!

KYO: *swallows hard*

GUILE: SONIC BOOM!  *throws a Sonic Boom at Kyo*

KYO: EEP!  *ducks*

BAO: AHH!  *gets hit by the Sonic Boom and dies*

KENSOU: *comes out*  NOOOOO!  Not again!  *picks up Bao and runs off with him*

KYO: You…you can't hurt me.  I'm Kyo, hero of SNK!

GUILE: *punches Kyo in the face*

KYO: OWWIE!  That hurt!  *starts running around the platform*

GUILE: *runs after Kyo*

KYO: AHHHH!  *curls into a fetal position*

GUILE: *gets zonked on the head with a giant weight*

ANNOUNCER: K.O.!!!!

KYO: *gets up and looks behind him*

HSIEN-KO: *smiles at Kyo*

KYO: Thanks a lot!  I appreciate that!

HSIEN-KO: *throws a key at Kyo*

KYO: Huh?

HSIEN-KO: I'm in room 402!  *giggles*

KYO: Uh heh heh…

ANNOUNCER: FIGHT!

KYO: Huh?  *turns around*

CAMMY: CANNON SPIKE!  *launches Kyo into the air*

KYO: AHHHH!  *falling back down*

CAMMY: REVERSE SHAFT BREAKER!  *nails Kyo in the crotch on the way up*

KYO: (o_o)  *is in extreme pain while falling back down*

CHIN: *smoking up*  Well, that definitely is a SHAFT breaker.  Heh heh…

RYU: *watching on a television set*  Heh heh…she said "shaft."

KEN: Heh-heh, heh, heh…

KYO: *struggling to his feet*  Oh no, is that Bison?!

CAMMY: What?  *turns around*

KYO: OROCHI NAGI!!!!  *hits Cammy with his SDM*

CAMMY: *falls down*

ANNOUNCER: K.O.!!!!

KYO: Oh yea!  Who's house?  Kyo's house!  Who's house?  Kyo's house!  *walks off while "raising the roof"*

IIn the Nairobi stage with the dune buggies racing/I

KEN: Shit, I gotta fight in this woman form!  I'm gonna kill that narrator!

RYU: Don't worry about it.  I'll let you go first, okay Ken?

KEN: Okay.

HAOHMARU: *rubbing his eyes*  Whoa, I need to lay off the Sake.  Ken's starting to look like a woman to me.

NAKORURU: That's cuz he IS a woman.

HAOHMARU: Really?  You know, he IS kinda sexy in a way…and look at that cleavage, it beats yours anyday.

NAKORURU: Shut up!

HAOHMARU: No, YOU shut up!

NAKORURU: No YOU shut up!

HAOHMARU: No, YOU—

HIBIKI: BOTH OF YOU, SHUT THE HELL UP RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!

NAKORURU: Sorry…

HAOHMARU: Sorry…

HIBIKI: That's better…I'll go first.

ANNOUNCER: This is going to be a match to remember!  FIGHT!

KEN: Pfft, this is gonna be an easy match.

HIBIKI: *walks up to Ken looking all innocent*

KEN: Don't worry little girl, I'll go easy on you.

HIBIKI: *slams the sword case into Ken's stomach*

KEN: (o_o)  Ouch…

HIBIKI: Hya!  *slices the sword at Ken*

KEN: Whoa!  *jumps back*  Hey, that's not fair!  I don't have a weapon!

HIBIKI: Tough luck, shit-head.  *start crazily slicing at Ken*

KEN: EEP!  *dodging the slices*  Take this!  *kicks sand into Hibiki's face*

HIBIKI: AHH!  I'm blind!  *starts walking around in circles*

KEN: *takes Hibiki's sword and smashes her in the head with it*

ANNOUNCER: FINEST K.O.!!!!

KEN: Oh yea, I rule.

ANNOUNCER: Get ready…FIGHT!

HAOHMARU: Prepare yourself, babe!

KEN: I'm a guy!

HAOHMARU: Not from what I'm seeing.

KEN: Grrr!

LEONA: *in background*  Sooo…what're we looking at again?

FOKKER: I…have no idea.

LEONA: I see…

RALF: Psst…Leona.  Is that Ken and Ryu over there?

LEONA: Looks like 'em.

RALF: Alright, PAY BACK TIME!  *runs off into the distance*

HAOHMARU: Ougi Senpu-Retsu-Zan!  *throws the tornado at Ken*

KEN: ARRGH!  *falls down*

HAOHMARU: And now, for the finishing blow… Tenha Danku Retsu Zan!  *does his level 3 super*

KEN: WHOA!  *jumps back, getting his shirt sliced open*

RYU: ((o_o))  *falls over with a nosebleed*

HAOHMARU: ((o_o))  *falls over with a nosebleed*

ANNOUNCER: K.O.!!!!

KEN: Damn…how am I supposed to fight with my Gi torn like this?

NAKORURU: You may have beaten Hibiki and you may have demolished Haohmaru…but you cannot defeat SUPER CHEESY NAKORURU!

KEN: Oh no…

ANNOUNCER: Live and let die…FIGHT!

NAKORURU: Annu Mutsube!  *does her sliding slash attack*

KEN: Arrgh!  *falls over*

NAKORURU: Annu Mutsube!  *does her sliding slash attack again*

KEN: Arrgh!  *falls over*

NAKORURU: Annu Mutsube!  *does her sliding slash attack yet again*

KEN: Arrgh!  *falls over*

NAKORURU: Annu Mutsube!  *does her sliding slash attack once more*

KEN: Arrgh!  *falls over*

ANNOUNCER: K.O.!!!!

RYU: *jumps in*  Jeez, that was SOO lame!  Can't you come up with a better strategy than that?

ANNOUNCER: FIGHT!

RYU: Hadouken!  Hadouken!  Hadouken!  Hadouken!  Shinkuu Hadouken!  *throwing fireballs at Nakoruru*

NAKORURU: *dodging*  Look who's talking!

???: HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!

RYU: *turns around*  Huh?

BISON: *driving a semi-truck*  HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!

RYU: Not again…

RALF: *pulls up next to Bison in a dune buggy*  Not today, pal!  Ryu's mine!

BISON: HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!

RALF: Take this!  *rams into Bison*

BISON: HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!  *flips out and explodes*

RALF: You're mine Ryu and Ken!!!  *makes the dune buggy jump into the air*

RYU: Not today!  Zoink!  *grabs Nakoruru and puts her directly under the buggy*

NAKORURU: Huh?

RYU: Bye bye!

NAKORURU: *looks up*  Oh crap…

RALF: *crashes the dune buggy onto Nakoruru, then drives away*  HA HA HA!  YES!  I GOT RYU!

ANNOUNCER: FINEST K.O.!!!!

RYU: That's what you think.  Eww…I feel sorry for the guy who has to clean that.  *walks away with Ken*

IScene shifts to the announcer's booth/I

ANNOUNCER: Before we finish with our last match of the day, let's have a word from another one of our sponsors!  Here comes the commercial.  He—

ROBERT: *holding a mallet*  Yea, you better shut up.

ANNOUNCER: *laughs nervously*  Heh heh…

CROWD: *looks up at the monitor in the arena*

ICommercial begins/I

TEEN: *watching some people*  Gee, I'd sure like to set those people on fire over there.  But I'm way too far away to get the job done.  If only I had something that would throw flame ON them…

ANNOUNCER: Well now you can have something to throw flame on others!

TEEN: Really?

ANNOUNCER: That's right, kid!  Introducing the Kusanagi Flamethrower!

TEEN: Wow!  Neato!

ANNOUNCER: You bet it's neato!  The flamethrower looks EXACTLY like the Kusanagi-style glove, but when you press the little button on there, it shoots flame out!

TEEN: *setting fire to a bunch of people*  Thanks guy!

ANNOUNER: There's also the Yagami Flamethrower!  It looks like the Kusanagi Flamethrower, but it has a moon on it and it shoots purple flame!  These flamethrowers make great gifts for kids, even on Christmas!

KID: *puts on glove*  Wowee!  Thanks Santa!  *sets his parents on fire*

PARENTS: AHHH!  *rolling around*

SHINGO: What about me, can I have one?

ANNOUNCER: Silly Shingo, Kusanagi Flamethrowers are for kids!

SHINGO: But that guy over there is in his 40's!

MIDDLE-AGED MAN: *setting fire to houses*  YEY!  I may be old, but I'm having a blast!

ANNOUNCER: Okay we lied…Kusanagi Flamethrowers are for everyone BUT you.

SHINGO: D'oh!

ANNOUNCER: The Kusanagi Flamethrower…it makes setting fires a WHOLE lot easier!  Gasoline sold separately.

IScene shifts to the festival stage with the Haohmaru/E.Honda balloons in the air/I

DAN: Here we go, Joe!

JOE: I'll go first, okay?

DAN: Umm…who's going first over there.

JOE: Raiden I think.

DAN: Okay, go ahead.

ANNOUNCER: FIGHT!

RAIDEN: Say yo prayas…WIMP!!!  *eats his microphone*

JOE: Oh yea?  Well…take this!  *moons Raiden*

RAIDEN: Ooooh!  ^_^

JOE: SLASH KICK!

RAIDEN: Huh?

JOE: *kicks Raiden in the stomach, which has no effect*  Uh oh…

RAIDEN: Heh heh…Ready?  GO!  *clotheslines Joe*

JOE: Ugh…*gets up*

RAIDEN: THUNDA CRUSH BOMB!  *does his super on Joe*

JOE: …

RAIDEN: RWOAR!  *throws his finger into the air*

JOE: SCREW UPPA!  *launches Raiden into the air*

RAIDEN: AHHHH!!!!  *gets eaten by the E.Honda balloon*

ANNOUNCER: K.O.!!!!

JOE: Ooh, what a way to go.

ANNOUNCER: Live and let die…FIGHT!

ZANGIEF: Heh heh heh…

JOE: Hurricane Uppa!  *throws projectiles at Zangief*

ZANGIEF: *rolls through*

JOE: Uh oh…

ZANGIEF: *grabs Joe*  FINAL!  *slams Joe*  ATOMIC!  *slams Joe*  BUSTA!  *finishes Joe off*

ANNOUNCER: K.O.!!!!

DAN: I guess it's up to me now!

ANNOUNCER: This is gonna be a match to remember…FIGHT!

DAN: Gadouken!  *throws mini-fireball*

ZANGIEF: *clotheslines through it and hits Dan*

DAN: Grrr…take this!  Dankukyaku!  *flies at Zangief*

ZANGIEF: *rolls through and Spinning Piledrives Dan*

DAN: Ugh…*getting dizzy*

ZANGIEF: I'm good, eh comrade?

DAN: Yea…but not good enough!  Prepare yourself…for the most powerful attack ever!

ZANGIEF: ???

DAN: Chouhatsu Densetsu!  *starts rolling around Zangief, doing the Chouhatsu Densetsu*

ZANGIEF: (o_o)  ARGGH!  *falls over*

ANNOUNCER: K.O.!!!!

DAN: Wow, I really beat him?

RYU: *watching the television*  He really beat him?

GO: *somewhere far away*  He really beat him?

ANNOUNCER: That ends day 1 for the Capcom vs SNK 2 tournament folks!  Go home, relax, and we'll see you here again tomorrow!  Have a nice day!  See ya later!  By—*gets hit in the head with a mallet*

ROBERT: Heh heh…

bWhat a chapter!  We had three different bouts!  Kyo and Benimaru beat Eagle, Guile, and Cammy in the first match.  Ryu and Ken defeated Hibiki, Haohmaru, and Nakoruru in the second match.  And Joe and Dan toppled Raiden and Zangief in the third match.  What's to happen now?  Stay tuned for chapter 12!/b


	12. KARAOKE NIGHT

CHAPTER 12: KARAOKE NIGHT

bIn Chapter 11, we saw the first day of fighting come to a close.  But not without a few good matches, like Kyo and Benimaru vs Eagle, Guile, and Cammy.  Also, Ryu and Ken fought Hibiki, Haohmaru, and Nakoruru, and Dan and Joe fought Zangief and Raiden.  Now, we join our fighters relaxing in a bar downtown in Miami, and it happens to be karaoke night.  Hmmm…

Scene shifts to the inside of the bar, where Eagle and Benimaru are seen sitting at a table/b

BENIMARU: Really?

EAGLE: Yup.

BENIMARU: Same here…jeez, people ALWAYS think I'm batting for the other team…know what I'm saying?

EAGLE: Of course…just because I say I like strong men doesn't mean I swing that way!

BENIMARU: You know…you are SO like me!  Except for that you're not as handsome…and not as young…and you're a little weird too…

EAGLE: Uh, yea.  *drinks a beer*

KYO: *sits down*  What the hell was that back there, Benimaru?  I thought we were partners!

BENIMARU: Hey, you won didn't you?

KYO: Well, yea…but thanks to you, I have a date with a ghost tonight!

BENIMARU: Really?  Sounds pretty sweet.

KYO: '-_-  Yea, well, I better drink up.  The drunker I am, the easier it'll be.

EAGLE: *looks at the other end of the bar*  Hmmm…hey, you guys wanna hear some karaoke?

BENIMARU: Uh sure thing.

EAGLE: *goes up to the front of the bar*  Ahem…will the real Slim Shady please stand up?

EMINEM: *stands up*

EAGLE: *shoots him in the head*

EMINEM: *dies*

DRE: Thanks man, I've been wanting to do that for a LONG time.  *leaves with Snoop Dogg*

EAGLE: *sits back down*

BENIMARU: (o_o)  Umm…why did you do that?

EAGLE: That bastard did nothing but insult homosexuals…it wasn't right if you ask me…

BENIMARU: O…kay…

IGuile, Cammy, and Chun Li are seen sitting at a table/I

GUILE: *holding his head*

CAMMY: That punk!  He nailed me while my back was turned!

CHUN LI: But I thought that was how you liked it, Cammy?

CAMMY: (o_o)  NOO!  Not THAT kind of nailing!

CHUN LI: Oh…

CAMMY: …

CHUN LI: …

GUILE: …

CAMMY: HEY!  How about one of us sing some karaoke?

CHUN LI: Sorry, but I'm not up for it.

CAMMY: Well, I like to watch, but I can't sing…how about you Guile?

GUILE: *looks up*  Huh?

CAMMY: Why don't you sing some karaoke?

GUILE: I don't want to.

CAMMY: Come on, it'll be fun!

GUILE: Well…alright, if you insist.  I gotta warn you though…I don't really sing…I rap really.

CAMMY: You rap?

GUILE: Yup…I grew up in the 'hood and I'm down with all kinds of rap.

CHUN LI: Go for it then, Will.

GUILE: *goes up to the microphone*  Ladies and gentleman, I'd like to sing you a song about the town we're in right now…Miami…*Will Smith's "Miami" starts*

CROWD: *watching Guile* 

GUILE: Here I am in the place where I come let go!  In Miami, the place where the sun set low!  Every day like a Mardi Gras, everybody party all day, no work, all play, okay?  *walking over to the bar*  So we sip a little something, lay to rest the spill.  *takes a quick drink*  Me 'n Charlie at the bar running up a high bill.

CHARLIE: *salutes Guile*

GUILE: Nothin' less than ill when we dressed to kill, every time the ladies pass they be like—

CHUN LI and CAMMY: Hi Will!

GUILE: Can y'all feel me?

CROWD: Yea!

GUILE: All ages and races, real sweet faces, every different nation.  Spanish—

ROSA: *poses*

GUILE: Haitian, Indian—

SALLY: *poses*

GUILE: Jamaican.  Black—

ELENA: *poses*

GUILE: White—

KARIN: *poses*

GUILE: Cuban and Asian!

SAKURA: *poses*

GUILE: I only came for two days of playin'—

GIRLS: Awwww.

GUILE: But every time I come I always wind up staying!

GIRLS: Yey!

GUILE: This the type of town I can spend a few days in, Miami the city that keeps the groove blazin'!

CHARLIE and SAGAT: Party in the city where the heat is on, all night on the beach 'till the break of dawn!

CHUN LI: Welcome to Miami!

CAMMY: Bienvenidos a Miami!

CHARLIE and SAGAT: Bouncing in the club where the heat is on, all night on the beach 'till the break of dawn!

GUILE: I'm going to Miami!

CHUN LI: Welcome to Miami!

GIRLS: *screaming and rushing to the stage to fondle Guile*

GUILE: ^_^

GUYS IN CROWD: Grrrr!!!

GUILE: (o_o)

RYO: Look, he's stealing our women guys!

ROBERT: Yea, I think we need to teach him a lesson.

KYO: YUKI!  I thought you were dead?!

YUKI: Nope, I just didn't want to be around a sissy like you anymore.  Guile, on the other hand, he's MY kind of man!  *snuggles Guile*

GUILE: ^_^

KYO: …ROARRRR!!!!  *goes Orochi*

IORI: *in a corner of the bar*  Hmm, guess it IS possible.  *drinks a beer*

KYO: Kill…Kill…KILL!  *rushes after Guile*

GUILE: AHHH!!  *runs to the door of the bar*  You'll never take me alive!

KYO: ROARRR!!!  *charging Guile*

GUILE: EEP!  *gets grabbed by the ear*

KYO: Huh?

GUYS: Huh?

GIRLS: Huh?

WIFE: Damnit William, are you trying to cheat on me again?  No, not THIS time!  You're coming home with me RIGHT now!  *drags Guile out of there by his ear*

GUILE: NOOOOO!!!!

GIRLS: (o_o)

GUYS: Hahahahaha!  *laughing at Guile*

IScene shifts to Terry, Andy, Rock, Dan, and Joe all sitting at a table/I

TERRY: *yawns*  Well, looks like I won my first match.

JOE: And we won our first match as well.

DAN: Yup.

ROCK: (In JapaneseAnd I'm gonna win my first match)

TERRY: How about you, Andy?  Did you win YOUR first match?  *snicker*

DAN and JOE: *snicker*

ANDY: Very funny, guys.  If I didn't have this stab wound, I'd pound all of you.

TERRY: Heh heh…

DAN: Hey, who's up for a game of pool?

JOE: Me!

TERRY: Count me in!

ROCK: (In JapaneseI guess so…)

ANDY: Nah, I'll sit this one out.

TERRY: Okay bro, will be back in a little while.  *gets up and leaves*

DAN, JOE, and ROCK: *leaves*

ANDY: *sighs* …

MAI: *sits down next to Andy*  Awww Andy…what's the matter?

ANDY: I'm just depressed, that's all…I wish I could fight this year.

MAI: I know dear…hey, how about a nice drink?

ANDY: Sure, but make it a Bud Light or something like that.

MAI: Okay.  Hey King, a Bud Light please!

IRyu, Ken, Iori, Ryo, Robert, and Yamazaki are all at the bar, drinking a beer/I

RYU: How you doin'?

KEN: How you doin'?

IORI: How you doin'?

RYO: How you doin'?

ROBERT: How you doin'?

YAMAZAKI: How you doin'?

SAGAT: *walking by*  How you doin'?

RYU: How you doin'?

KYO: *leaving the bar*  How you doin'?

YAMAZAKI: …guys, this is REALLY getting' lame.

RYU: True…true…

DAN: *from the pool table*  WAZZZZAAAAAAP!!!!!

RYU: Oy…

IScene shifts back to Andy and Mai/I

ANDY: *on his tenth beer*  Ya know, you weally pweety Mai!  Anybodys say that you before?

MAI: *smiling*  Oh sure, but I've never heard that from you before.

ANDY: Oh.  *guzzles beer down*

MAI: Here, have another one.  *gives Andy another beer*

ANDY: Why tank…you…Mai-yai-yai—*passes out at the table*

MAI: Heh heh…

IKyo is seen sitting in a hotel room/I

KYO: Umm…miss Ko?

HSIEN KO: *from the bathroom*  Please, call me "Hsien Ko."

KYO: Okay…Hsien Ko…umm, what exactly are we going to do?

HSIEN KO: We're just going to play a few fun games…heh heh…

KYO: *swallows hard*

bLooks like our fighters are having a fun time tonight!  We saw Eagle kill Eminem, Guile sing Miami, and Mai making Andy drunk!  I have a feeling that something big's gonna happen tonight, though…what could it be?  You'll just have to stay tuned to part 13 of our story.  See you then./b


End file.
